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Man, woman, I hadn’t ever been choosy when seeking out my forever person.Dick and pussy riled me up in equal measures, although I tended toward men back in my dating days.Since signing on as Elite Escort’s first queer guy in their MM branch, I’d been perfectly content with dick alone.
I’d labeled myself bisexual back in high school, and thankfully, neither of my parents nor my siblings gave a shit how I identified when they were all straight.It had been a boy in a tux who’d accompanied me to the prom at the high school we’d had to bus to for four years.We’d gotten a lot of bull from the conservative rednecks that lived in our area, but I hadn’t ever been one to care what others thought.
Until my wedding day approached and I was left on my own to notify every single person on the guest list that there would be no exchanging of vows.
I’d given a shitthatday.Never had I felt such utter humiliation and a sense of insecure embarrassment.The topping on that cake of emotional turmoil was the barely beating heart inside my chest that still felt knifed even though it had long ago bled out.
Pushing aside thoughts of the past came easier when surrounded by my family, thank fuck.We got caught up on the latest gossip—all three of my siblings had settled in or near Nodhead Falls.I couldn’t give a rat’s ass about half the people they socialized with, more interested in my brother, Fred, and Donnie talking about their fishing trip the weekend before I hadn’t been able to join in.
We had a camp farther east on the Androscoggin River—a fisherman’s paradise.Loaded with trout and smallmouth bass, the rushing water supplied dinner damn near every night whenever we needed a respite from reality.
It had been a hot minute for me though.
Mom blew out the candles on her cinnamon bun “cake”, a 13x9 pan of gooey deliciousness she’d baked herself same as every year.Another pan sat in the kitchen to feed the ravenous piranha grandchildren.
“So how’s my little love?”Mom asked, and I shook my head, unable to help my smirk.She’d been calling me that for as long as I could remember, never mind that I’d grown to tower over her.
“Good, Mom.”
“Don’t you lie to me, Kellen Christopher Roberts.”
I snorted and shoved a bite of her birthday cake between my lips.
“Have you seen that asshole lately?”my brother Jacob asked.
Mom elbowed him.“Language,” she reminded him, tipping her head toward the kitchen and the little ears that picked up everything.
“Sorry,” he muttered out of habit, his concerned focus still on me.
“No, I haven’t,” I answered.“His friends remained his when we split.Can’t say I miss any of them—or him for that matter.”
“Good riddance,” my baby sister Suzi said, her eyes blazing with hormonal bitchiness.
She’d always been my champion even though she was a year younger than me.She had more spit and vinegar than any woman I knew, and I could admit to feeling downright thrilled when she’d gotten all riled up about Xavier being a lying, cheating whore and made everyone who’d been invited to our wedding aware of his actions.
“Take it easy, Suz,” Donnie said, running his hand over her large belly.
She huffed and swatted at his fingers, shooing him away.“I’m fine,” she snipped.“I’ll be even better when this third boy you planted inside me gets the hell out so I can breathe again.”
I chuckled and filled my mouth with Mom’s kickass cinnamon roll cake.Three kids in three years—I didn’t know what the fuck Suzi and Donnie were thinking not using protection.Obviously the two of them were well on their way to having a football team of their own.Had they met earlier in life, they’d have had one already.
“How’s business?”Sarah asked, and I snorted, kicking her foot beneath the table where she sat across from me.
“You mean my volunteering at the vet clinic?”I asked about how I spent most of my daytime hours when I wasn’t in the gym or sitting by myself in my apartment when my few friends were busy.
She rolled her eyes.“No,” she half-sang her reply.“I’m glad you’re putting all those farm chores we were forced to do as kids to good use, but you know what I’m talking about.”
My whole family was aware of what I did to make the money that had fixed up the cabin last year and had started nice little savings accounts for all my nieces and nephews, bun in the oven included.
“Can’t complain,” I finally answered her question.
“Aren’t you tired of…well, the lack of intimacy?”Amy, my sister-in-law asked quietly.She was the romantic of the group, and when she wasn’t connected at the hip with Jacob, she had her nose in a smut-filled book.
“I have zero interest in getting involved with anyone,” I answered honestly.“Man or woman.”Everyone at the table was aware of how deeply Xavier had wounded me.Ours wasn’t a family who kept secrets or emotions to ourselves.Empathy ran deep, often to the point of weariness.
“So Brian’s going to be the starting quarterback this year,” I tossed out, needing a change of topic before my mind slid back into the dumps.
My nephew grinned down the table at me, and the guys started talking stats and college scholarships in a matter of seconds exactly as I’d expected they would.
