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He slipped his arms around her and held her tight for a moment. She melted into his embrace, but only for a moment.
“Who’s ready for some hot chocolate?” Amber asked.
“Only if we can spike it with something.” Lucas grinned and Cole nodded in agreement.
Chelsea rolled her eyes, but offered up a suggestion. “How about a Mogul Smoker over at the Paw? It’s coffee and hot chocolate and just enough booze to help you really warm up.”
“Sounds good to me.” Amber linked her arm through her sister’s. “Besides, I think Cole may have hit his limit for skating for one night.”
There was definitelysomething going on with her. Cole could feel it and it worried him. A lot.
Maybe her brother had been right, and the lack of certainty in her future was starting to get to her. No matter how much Cole wanted to put Cal’s words out of his head, he couldn’t seem to let it go. Especially with the odd shift that seemed to be slowly happening with her.
After sharing hot toddies with the others and making promises to touch base in the morning, because Chelsea really was determined to spend as much time with her sister as possible, Cole once again managed to get Amber alone.
But when Cole finally slipped under the sheets of the guest bed they were sharing, and snuggled up to Amber’s smooth, warm back, the last thing he felt like doing was talking about the future.
He traced his finger down her arm and over her soft curves until his hand landed on her hip. He splayed his fingers wide and pulled her back into him. A moan slipped from her lips. It was the sexiest sound he’d ever heard.
“You’re so beautiful, Amber.” Cole kissed the back of her neck and she wiggled closer to him. “Damn, woman. I lo—” The word died on his lips before he could say it out loud and he instantly regretted it. She stiffened in his arms. Cole squeezed his eyes shut and silently chastised himself. He wanted to tell Amber how he felt about her. Of course he did, but not in bed. Not with her naked in his arms and his raging erection pressing into her back. That didn’t feel right. It wasn’t special. It wasn’t…enough.Besides, he needed to be damn sure about his feelings for her. The last thing he wanted to do was say something he wasn’t sure about, or worse, that he’d get wrong and make a mess of.
Never before had he been in love. He had no idea what it was supposed to feel like. Or what he was supposed to do with the emotions that bashed about inside him.And what if she didn’t reciprocate? Would that change anything?
No.
He wasn’t going to say a damn thing until it was the right moment.
Besides, Amber was distracted and he didn’t want whatever it was that was going on with her to affect the way she felt about him. And he knew what to do about that. “I look forward to figuring out the next step with you.” It was beyond a lame thing to say, but it was also the truth. Besides, Cole wasn’t stupid and he was pretty sure he knew what was bothering Amber.
She turned in his arms, the sexy moaning a distant memory as she propped herself up on her elbow. “You what?”
Cole tried not to look disappointed because as much as he would have preferred to make her moan all night long, there were things they needed to talk about. He pushed himself up to a sitting position. “I look forward to figuring out the next step with you.” When he said it again, it sounded even more ridiculous. Like something an insurance salesman might say and not at all something a man falling in love with a woman would say. He resisted the urge to groan out loud, and stayed the course. “I mean, we did say our stop in Cedar Springs would be a good time toplan.” He made sure to emphasize the word he knew she needed to hear.
If her brothers were even remotely right, Amber needed the stability of aplan. She needed to know what to do and what was happening next. No doubt that was why she was feeling so lost and acting so strangely. If a plan was what the woman needed, it would be exactly what he would give her.
She blinked in confusion a few times and propped herself up with an elbow. “You want to make a plan?You? You hate plans.”
“That’s not true.” He laughed, but she was right. At least a little. “Besides, I know that’s what you need.” He reached across the space between them to touch her. “I know what you gave up to be here. To be with me. And I want to make sure I—”
“Is that what this is about?” She stiffened, and Cole had the distinct impression he’d said something wrong. Really wrong. “You think I gave everything up foryou.”
Alarm bells went off in his brain as he watched her shake her head. “No,” he said quickly. “That’s not what I was—”
“I gave it all up,” Amber interrupted him. “But it wasn’t for you.” Tears pooled in her eyes, and he instantly wanted to hold her close so she wouldn’t cry. “It was what I needed to do,”
she continued. “You were a…a bonus.” She laughed weakly, but the laughter vanished as quickly as it had started.
“Amber.” Cole shifted so he was closer to her, but still he didn’t gather her up in his arms the way he wanted to. “I know that it wasn’t about me.” She winced but didn’t say anything so he continued. “And that’s why I want you to know that I understand how hard this is for you.” She blinked. “Not knowing what’s happening next,” he said quickly. Her lips curled up a little. A small sign that Cole took as a step in the right direction. “I mean, it probably wouldn’t hurt if we thought about it a little bit, right?”
She didn’t speak for a few minutes, but then she nodded and a real smile crossed her face. “You’re right. Okay. Yes. We should think about what comes next. I mean, we can’t stay in Cal and Milena’s guest room forever, right?”
It was then that he pulled her into his arms and held her tight. Relief washed over him. Cole had never been good at communicating his feelings with women. Especially women he cared about. Hell, he’d never cared about a woman the way he cared about Amber, so how could he have any practice with it at all? But that didn’t matter. The only thing that mattered was that he had her in his arms and he was going to do whatever it took to keep her there.
If that meant making plans for the first time in his life, that’s what he’d do. He’d figure out the future as far as it pertained to Amber because that’s what she wanted. Hell, it’s what sheneeded.
Whether or not she admitted it.
And one thing Cole knew for sure was that he’d do whatever it took to give this woman what she needed.
