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I want to say so many things, but I know at the end of the day, he’s right. Elliot is a homophobic asshole. He’d make Zach’s life even more hellish if he knew. “You’re almost out of that house.”
He laughs, but it’s sad. “My sisters aren’t. I can’t get kicked out or banned from there. I’m already getting hives, thinking about the day Elliot tells me to get out. That I’m eighteen and can’t stay there anymore.”
I want that for him, but I also know that the girls will be in danger. So I don’t push. “We’ll figure it out, Zach,” I try to reassure him even though we’ve been saying that for a long time.
His grandma is great for overnights, but she can’t take them full-time. Her health isn’t steady enough, and neither is her energy. “Yeah,” he says sadly, but I know he doesn’t believe it. “Only ten more years in the closet.” He says this so damn sadly, my heart cracks open.
That’s not fair.
I may not exactly like thinking about Zach hooking up with some guy—or anyone at all—but it’s not fair that he has to wait for ten years because of his stupid, asshole of a stepfather. And his useless damn mother.
And this fucking narrowminded town.
Damn it. I need to find a way to fix this for him.
FOURTEEN
ZACH
“I figured it out.”
Adam’s voice has my attention as I pull on my shirt over my head and look around at the emptying locker room. I’m on cleanup duty tonight. So since I had to stay behind anyway, I took my time in the shower.
The hot water felt damn good on my aching muscles.
“Figured what out?” He’s dressed and sitting on one of the benches by my locker. The final guy walks out, leaving us alone, except for Coach who is in his office with Coach Leighton.
He stands up. “Let’s go clean up, and I’ll tell you.”
I grin at that. It doesn’t matter whose turn it is to clean up, the other one always stays behind to help. I nod and go with him, curious as hell about what he has to tell me.
Maybe he did more research after what I told him in the barn a couple of days ago, but I’m not sure. He doesn’t seem too concerned with an actual label, but he did seem damn happy to find out he’s not the only one who doesn’t seem obsessed with sex.
A sense of pride flows through me as I think about how his eyes lit up when I read the definition of demisexual to him. Even if my mom or Elliot saw my search history, despite me checking many times that I deleted it all, it would be worth it.
We start picking up the practice field. There isn’t too much of a mess, but it’ll give us a minute to chat in private before we go to put a load of jerseys in the wash and head out.
“So what did you figure out?” I ask.
“How to get you laid.”
Shit.I almost trip over my own damn feet as I walk closer to where he’s picking up some of the footballs used at practice. “What?”
He’s grinning from ear to ear now, standing tall and proud. “I did. It’s not fucking fair that you can’t hook up just because you have to keep your secret.” His face has turned serious now, and I can’t help but think about which look is more attractive on him. Happy and excited or stern and excited.
They both work for him.
But also—I’m not sure where the hell this is going.
“You deserve to have all the normal experiences, Zach.” He touches my shoulder gently, and holy fuck my brain short-circuits for a moment. He really can’t talk about this while he’s touching me.
“Experiences?” I barely squeak out, willing my brain to come back online.
“Yeah.” He lowers his voice and leans a little closer to me. “Sex. With someone other than yourself.”
Holy fuck. My dick jolts at his words. His deep voice saying the wordsexis just too damn much, but I can’t get myself to move away. And what exactly is he trying to say here?
Sex? With someone other than myself?
