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"Are you questioning my decisions, nurse?"
"I am trying to understand, doctor."
I stand strong as he towers over me. I can tell that this conversation is not going well. He is angry and the only reason I can guess he is angry is because I shot him down in surgery this morning.
"Did I not perform well during surgery today?"
He huffs. "Not relevant."
"In fact, it is the only thing that is relevant." I can feel my own anger building.
"Nurse Emma - "he has a threat in his voice. "I would be very careful with how you choose to speak to me, especially in front of other staff. Now I suggest you appreciate the fact that you still have a job and go and do it."
"Still have a job? What in the world - "
He stands up and walks around the desk, placing his hand on my lower back he pushes me out of his office, closing the door behind himself.
I look over at his receptionist and she shrugs and mouths the word sorry.
It looks like she is fully aware that he is a difficult man.
I wonder if all of the nurses find it this hard to fit in with him and his bad attitude.
I do not want to be stuck on aftercare. I need experience, lots of it, in surgery. I am working here specifically to gain experience in surgery, with someone who is supposed to be the best plastic surgeon in the business. Ok, I do have to admit that I was very impressed with how he operates, having now been lucky enough to witness it firsthand, but I need to be in surgery every day and now it seems as though he is doing everything in his power to keep me from doing that. Maybe it is some kind of trial thing? All the new nurses might have to go through it.
I think I need to ask around and try and figure out what is really going on. This is my career after all. I worked hard to get here, and I will work harder to stay here.
Sally and Tabatha are talking by the nurses' station, so I head over to them. They are both surgical nurses and were both present in today's surgery.
"Hey ladies, how is your morning going?" I say joining them at the station.
"Emma, hey. We are just about to scrub up for the next surgery; are you ready?" I shrug. "I was taken off the roster." Sally looks confused "Why? That's weird." But Tabatha laughs a little. "It's not that weird; did you hear how she shot down Mr. Tall Dark and Handsome when he flirted with her?"
Sally's eyes grow wide with understanding. "Oh, my word - yes - you probably shouldn't have done that." They both laugh light-heartedly. Then Tabatha says "Honey, don't stress it. He is brutally strict, but I know he recognizes a good nurse when he sees one. I am sure you will be back on the rosters tomorrow. You did very well this morning."
I sigh in frustration. "Thanks so much. I just really want to be in surgery. Anyways I am on aftercare, so I had better go and meet all of my patients."
I walk in the opposite direction to them as they head back to the operating room for the second surgery of the day. Well, I will just have to keep asking around, but in the meantime, I am going to do the absolute best job at being an after-care nurse.
I guess I could be overthinking this whole thing anyway. I am brand new to the team and I was lucky enough to get into surgery on my first day. I can just use this time with the patients to familiarize myself with the hospital and learn my way around things.
I am sure I am just jumping to conclusions.
The day goes by really quickly. By the time I finish my shift, I am exhausted. My feet are aching, but my heart is happy. My first official day went really well - apart from my suspicion that Lennox is sabotaging me for some reason. I brush the thought aside. The other nurses are chatting about patients and sharing stories of what happened today in the hospital. A girl is standing at the locker next to mine, "You must be Emma." She smiles. "I'm Amy. I work in prenatal."
"Nice to meet you, Amy."
"How is it working for Dr. Lennox Blake? Does his reputation precede him?"
"Oh - what do you mean?"
She laughs, "Ugh, we always just joke about him. He flirts with everyone and has quite the reputation for being a playboy outside of work. I know a number of the nurses have tried their hand at getting his attention, but nothing has ever gone further than flirting - that we know of." She winks at me.
"So, it's true that he doesn't date co-workers?"
"Well yes, not since whatever happened at his last hospital. I don't really know the details. It's all just rumors anyway; you never know what to believe these days." She shrugs off the conversation and we chat about other things as we finish packing up and get ready to leave. Then I say goodbye to all the girls and head out of the hospital. Home time.
After a quick dinner, I collapse into my bed and hardly give another thought to Lennox and his shitty attitude.
