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26
Johnny, Sebastian, and I sat in the back of the limo, all of us hastily dressed, all of us watching Connor with fear and concern.
My fiancé sat next to me, staring out the window, his face blank and pale as a waxwork figure.
Outside the window, the lights of New York City flashed by in the early morning darkness.
“He had a heart attack on the way home,” Sebastian explained quietly. “His limo driver took him directly to the hospital, but… it was too late.”
Connor just stared out the window. He didn’t say anything.
“We don’t have to do this now,” Sebastian said. “His limo driver identified him to the authorities, so there’s no reason to – ”
“I want to see him,” Connor said, his voice monotone.
“We could wait until later this morning – ”
“I want to see my father.”
Sebastian acquiesced. “Okay.”
“Has anyone notified my mother and brother?”
“Yes, the hospital did, but they’re out of town.”
“He said that,” Connor remarked, like it was a mildly interesting fact he’d just now remembered. “He said it at dinner.”
“I… took the liberty of talking to your brother,” Sebastian said uncomfortably. “I hope that’s okay.”
Connor nodded. “It’s fine.”
“He said they’re flying back first thing in the morning.”
“Better to go see him now, then, so I don’t have to see them,” Connor said, though it was without bitterness. Just flat and unemotional.
He was quiet for a few seconds, then he asked, “Did Vincent say how my mother was taking it?”
“…not well. They had to sedate her.”
Connor nodded, but didn’t say anything else.
We were all quiet. I was already holding Connor’s hand; I hurt so much for him that I wanted to do something, anything, to connect with him more. I leaned my head against his shoulder, just to let him know I loved him.
He looked over at me. I couldn’t see him, but I felt his shoulder move, felt his lips kiss my hair. Then he looked back out the window.
“It’s funny,” he said, his voice almost puzzled. “It never occurred to me that tonight would be the last time I ever saw him alive.”
We were quiet for the rest of the ride to the hospital.
