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Trey sighed loudly and looked at the fire for a few moments before he spoke again. His eyes shot to mine. “There wasn’t anything you could do. I didn’t realize how bad things were until—” he stopped for a second and took another breath, “until I did. But I appreciate you saying that.” He paused for another few seconds. “But to be honest, there was nothing you could have done. There was nothing anyone could do. I had to do it.”
We were all blinking away tears, whether we’d ever admit to that or not. It was a great moment.
“I’m glad you came out the other side. A lot don’t,” I said and looked him straight in the eye. “You should feel proud of yourself. I hope you do.”
Trey leaned forward, resting his elbows on his knees. He gazed at both of us and told us something I was not expecting, “I’m scared as shit most days. Sometimes the anxiety of it all—eats me up inside.”
My eyes hit Beau’s, to find he was already looking at me. And the sadness in his expression probably matched mine.
Jillian’s speculation about Trey had been right on the money. He was afraid. And that was likely affecting his game.
“Sounds pretty fucking normal to me,” I said and nodded my head at Trey. “Don’t think you’d be human if that shit didn’t follow you around for a while.”
His shoulders slumped slightly, and I could see what looked like a glimmer of relief wash over his face. Which was interesting because my guts had unknotted a bit.
“One day at a time, right?” He kept his eyes on me.
I smiled at him. “You know the superstar fisherman over there,” I jerked my chin at Beau, “and I have got your back, right? And not just on the ice. All the time.”
Trey’s eyes filled with tears, and he closed them. His thumb and forefinger pinched the bridge of his nose.
“Today, tomorrow,” my voice creaked a bit too much, but I didn’t give a fuck, “and whenever you need us. We’re there for you.”
I saw Beau quickly swipe his eyes. “That asshole’s right. Our door’s always open. No questions asked.”
Trey nodded and sniffled a little. Then he sighed. “All right, do we need to hug this out?”
Beau and I laughed and smiled at each other over the fire. When our laughter settled, Trey stared at me. “You miss her,” he stated just above a whisper. “I love her to pieces, but what she did you—” he slowly shook his head, “that was fucking awful. I rolled around in the fetal position for an hour after she gave that idiot the rose.”
The knots in my stomach tightened and I found it tough to breathe. But I managed.
I shrugged and opened a Mars bar. “Shit happens,” was all I said—was all I wanted to say.
Well, no.
It wasn’t all I wanted to say.
I wanted to tell him that I agreed wholeheartedly with his conclusion.
That for a short time, she’d recently let me back into her bed.
And I’d assumed that meant I was back in her life.
But I wasn’t.
Not even close.
Nope.
She was just using me.
Again.
And fuck if I could tell the difference.
I was pretty sure I needed my head examined, because when she was with me—it was the best thing I’d ever experienced. With anyone.
No matter if I was sitting beside her killing zombies—or balls deep inside of her hot, wet pussy.
