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In front of everyone.
Fuck.
“No, honey, I’m tired. So tired,” she mumbled sweetly and burrowed her head further into my chest.
“Jillian.” I set my hand on her shoulder and moved it. “Wake up.”
She finally opened her eyes, blinking them furiously as she sat up. “Oh, sorry. I didn’t realize I’d fallen asleep.”
Yeah, neither had I.
“Okay, Wyatt, time to go.” I patted him on the back, and he jumped down. He and I said our goodbyes and left as quickly as I possibly could. I had to get out of there.
Away from Jillian.
“Cash, hold on,” Jillian called from behind me. I was nearly at my door. All I wanted to do was escape.
From her.
I’d had it.
It was after nine o’clock. The cameras were off.
I stopped and spun around so quickly she bumped into me. “Oof,” she said, tits pressed against my chest—and her eyes looking up at me like—
Fuck.
I could not do this.
“What?” I narrowed my gaze at her and stepped away. “What do you want now?”
She bit her lip and looked down to the ground for a second, then she met my eyes. “I just wanted to apologize for,” she pointed behind her, “that. I don’t even remember—”
That was enough.
This was all fucking enough.
I stepped forward and leaned down. Speaking directly into her face, I said, “Yeah? Well, I remember. I remember every fucking thing. And I sure as fuck remember everything that happened between us. Even though I wish like hell I could forget—” I gritted my teeth and clenched my hands into fists. “What I wouldn’t fucking give to forget everything about you. About us.”
Jillian moved back and the shocked look on her face might have affected me—if I gave a fuck anymore.
“You don’t mean that, Cash. You can’t—” she whispered. Her eyes stayed glued to mine, and she didn’t blink.
“Yeah, I fuckin’ do. I wish to Christ I could forget everything about you. I’d be so much happier if I could erase every goddamn detail of knowing you.”
Her eyes teared up, but her backbone straightened. With her hands on her hips, she leaned into me. “You don’t mean that.”
I slowly shook my head from side to side. “It’s the truth. I would be better off if I could forget ever meeting you.”
The tears in her eyes threatened to fall. “You’re an asshole,” she spat out as she blinked furiously.
“Yeah, that’s right. I’m the asshole in this situation. Fuck,” I said, feeling like my head was about to explode. I needed to get out of here before I said anything else.
“I’m done with you, Jillian. I’ll still pretend that we’re fucking friends in front of the cameras. But anything else? Go bother someone who gives a shit.”
11
Cash
