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“We wanted you to have a way to keep Trevor close all the time.”
June sniffed as they separated.“It’s perfect.”
“Would you like me to put it on you?”Donovan asked, and June nodded, turning her back to him.He took the necklace from the box and lowered it down in front of her face before doing up the clasp at the back of her neck.Once it was on, June held the pendant between her fingers as if giving her husband a hug.
My eyes drifted to Donovan while he brushed away the evidence of his emotion with his sleeve.Before I lost myself in his beautiful face, I stood, moving to sit back on the couch and sipping my tea.
A warm hand rested on my wrist as I put my drink on the table.June squeezed my arm gently, a gesture of gratitude for the gift, but also with understanding in her eyes.She’d seen the way I’d responded to Donovan’s sadness, I knew she had, and she mouthed, “Are you okay?”
My dad looked equally concerned, and I nodded, giving them the most believable smile I could manage.I didn’t want any attention on me, and I was grateful when Mum handed Donovan a gift and took one for herself too.I laid my hand over June’s, silently thanking her for checking, but then nodded towards Donovan, letting her know he needed her too.
I might have been pissed off with him, but I wasn’t heartless.
June winked at me, a gesture of her comprehension, then leaned back, shifting her attention to Donovan, who had just unwrapped a four-pack of Peroni and was eyeing it as if he were considering downing them all in quick succession.After thanking my parents, he placed the drinks down by his feet while Mum opened her present; a pair of gold earrings from my dad.
After a short while, Mum gathered up the plates and cups and sorted out whatever she needed to do in the kitchen.The smell of food coming through was outstanding; I knew we wouldn't have dinner for another few hours yet, though.I wasn't hungry, but the scents were so tempting.
With Mum gone, the balance in the room had shifted.Donovan had taken to looking at his phone, Dad and June were chatting, and I sat in a weird kind of limbo.Donovan caught my attention as he blew out a breath and then began typing something, his fingers moving swiftly across the screen and a frown wrinkling his forehead as he put the phone back on the arm of the chair.
He must have felt me looking at him as he stared at me for a second before reaching forward for the bag of gifts he and June had brought.He rummaged inside before pulling out a wrapped present that was thick and square at the bottom and then narrowed, as if there were two items beneath the paper.He stood, walking over to me, and then sat down cross-legged on the floor by my feet and handed me the gift.
I blinked a couple of times in surprise."For me?"I asked, glancing at it as if he’d somehow made a mistake.
"Yes.For you."I flicked my gaze between the present in my hand and Donovan once more.“Did you expect me to show up empty-handed?”
“No, but…” I trailed off, unsure how to end the sentence.I’d been so busy focusing on distancing myself from him that I hadn’t considered that he might have a present for me.Based on the things he’d said, at most, I thought perhaps I would get something that was from both him and June.
“Open it.”
My fingers peeled carefully at the tape that sealed the gold foil wrapping paper, and inside was a jewellery-type box nestled on top of a hinged photo frame that was closed over.I picked up the box and opened the frame.A rush of memories hit me, and I gasped.In one side of the frame was the photo of me, Donovan, and June in our Christmas aprons.But it was the other side that had taken my breath away.A very old-looking photo of me and Donovan as kids, sitting next to the Christmas tree in my childhood home.We were holding hands and grinning, clearly excited for the big day.He did, as he’d said, have slicked-back boyband hair, and my own hair was lighter and hung around my shoulders in curls.
“Where did you get this?”I breathed.
“Mum.After she spoke to us that day at Nan’s house, she was convinced she had some photos of us.She video-called her housekeeper and directed her to where all the old photo albums are.She has boxes and boxes of pictures, and she stayed in the call until Juliet had found the ones of us.Then Juliet scanned the photos and sent them to Mum, and Mum emailed them to me.”
Words escaped me as I looked at the photos side by side.Past and present.And in both, so happy.Still unable to form words, I placed the still-open frame on the table, glimpsing at it one more time before moving my attention to the jewellery box.
I flipped the lid up and gasped again.
Sparkling up at me were the earrings I’d looked at at Dawlish Christmas Market but had forgotten to go back and buy.I was positive he hadn’t bought them on the day, which meant he must have noted the name of the trader then gone to get them for me.
All of this is a lot of trouble to go to for someone he doesn’t care about.
I refused to let that thought take hold, still staring at the small snowflakes.“You remembered.”
“Yes, I did.”
Overwhelmed and a tad confused by his thoughtfulness, I looked down at him again.“Thank you.They’re stunning.”
He smiled softly.“Nova-”
Closing the lid of the jewellery box, I placed it on the coffee table beside the photo frame and reached into my own bag of gifts, effectively cutting him off.I was too overwhelmed.I also didn’t need to hear any guilt-induced apologies, and certainly no kindness from him.This situation was difficult enough without the, ‘sorry I hurt your feelings, but this was never really going anywhere’ speech.I knew it.Didn’t need it reiterating.
Once my fingers had landed on the present I’d been looking for, I forced a smile and passed it to Donovan.Beside me, Dad and June were still talking, but I could sense them occasionally glancing our way.They weren’t listening in, but they were keeping a close eye on us.
Donovan turned his present over in his hands once before opening it.It was a brown leather journal, personalised with his initials in gold writing at the bottom left corner, and in the centre, in the same lettering, were the words 'The Travel Hit List'.I'd bought it for him shortly after I'd written the Christmas hit list, wanting him to have something that reminded him of our time together when he moved on.A small part of me regretted getting it since he'd suggested he felt very differently about our time together than I did, but it was personalised for him and I still wanted him to have it.
"I know you write everything online usually, but I thought maybe you could use it to write about things you don't share with the whole world."
