Page 43 of The Nanny


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“Still,” he says. I meet his eyes, and that same warmth threatens to do me in. “Thank you.”

I remember then that I had another reason for waiting for him, and it feels almost cruel to tack on another heavy load, one after the other. Best to rip it off like a bandage, I guess.

“Right. Also, I should tell you...” I make a face. “Iris came back today.”

“Of course she did.” He breathes in deep just to blow it out. “I’ve tried to convince her to check in with me first before she visits, but sometimes she likes to be difficult. I think she’d love to prove what a shit dad I am.”

“You’re not a shit dad,” I stress. “I told you, remember? All kids want is for you to try.”

He nods solemnly. “I can do better. I can. I’ll make sure to be here more. When I’m supposed to be off. I promise.”

“Sophie would love that.”

So would I,I don’t say.

I fidget, knowing I should say more but unsure of how to broach it. I rub at my arm idly as I frown down at my feet, clearing my throat.

“Anyway, I thought I should tell you that Iris made some... insinuations,” I go on. “About me.”

“What?” Aiden’s expression turns hard. “What did she say to you?”

“Well, she was bad-mouthing you, and I just wanted to defend you, and she might have... made the implication that I was... more involved than I should be.”

Aiden doesn’t immediately catch my drift. “What do you mean?”

“She...” God, he’s going to make me say it. “I think she might have been implying that there was something... inappropriate going on between us.”

“What?”

“I know, ridiculous, but... I didn’t want to somehow be something she uses against you, so I thought you should know.”

“Right.” I notice his throat bob with a swallow. “Ridiculous.”

Ouch. I mean, I know I just said it, but hearing him repeat it stings.

“I just thought you should know. I don’t know... maybe we could work out some sort of schedule for Iris to come by more. I’m sure Sophie would love to do more things with her aunt.”

“Maybe that’s a good idea,” Aiden muses. “I should talk to her.”

“It couldn’t hurt,” I offer.

He still looks a little out of sorts. “You defended me?”

I stop midturn in my attempt to quickly retreat. “I... Yes?”

“You didn’t have to do that.”

“I didn’t say anything I didn’t think was true.”

“Oh. I... appreciate that.”

“I told you,” I urge. “Youarea good dad, Aiden. I promise.”

He nods slowly, looking at me with an expression I can’t read. I decide I should retreat like I planned, not wanting to make this encounter any more awkward than it already is.

“I’m starting to think we shouldn’t have discussions after eleven o’clock,” I say with a laugh.

His lips twitch. “They do seem to always go south, somehow.”

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