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Sure, he was never the same after we lost her. Consumed with securing my future and making sure I would be okay when the day came that he also left me. He became even busier at work. Distracting himself with one high profile case after another.
My father loved me, but in the days and weeks and months and years after the accident, he didn’t always show it.
But I’d take a lifetime of having him here cold and detached and unsure of how to reach me over a lifetime of being alone.
My eyes sting as I fist my chest, trying to rub away the constant ache. But nothing works.
Beyond sneaking out to find some strong alcohol or sleeping pills, I’ve resigned myself to broken sleep.
Knock.
Knock.
I almost forgot somebody is at the door. Reluctantly, I slip out of bed and pull on my All Hallows’ Saints hoodie. It swamps my small frame but feels like a layer of armour as I burrow deeper.
Pulling the door ajar, I peek out into the hall.
“Thank God,” Tally exclaims. “I’ve been standing out here for almost five minutes.”
“You have?”
Huh. I don’t remember hearing that many knocks.
I blink at her, trying to focus my bleary vision.
“You didn’t hear me?” Concern crinkles around her eyes.
“I… I was asleep.” The lie barely thaws the ice in my veins.
“You didn’t show up for class.”
“I’m not ready.”
“And I get it, I do. But you won’t come hang out with us. You won’t talk to Miss Linley. You won’t return our texts. We’re worried, Abs.”
“I’m fine. I just need some space.”
“Did something happen? With you and Elliot?”
“What? No! Why? Did he say something?”
“He didn’t say anything but from how skittish you’re acting, I’m inclined to think something did happen. If he hurt you?—”
“Stop.” I sigh. “He didn’t hurt me. Elliot would never hurt me.” At least not in the way she is thinking.
Relief skitters across her expression, and I want to scold her for even thinking Elliot would do something like that.
But then I remember that he did hurt me, so I swallow the words.
I need to let go of my silly little infatuation with him. I let myself get carried away. Saw signs that weren’t there. Wanted things he never wanted to give me.
“You can tell me, Abs. If something did happen…”
“It didn’t.”
“But he hasn’t come to see you?”
“I… What?”
