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I stormed out of the bathroom and walked back to the office. I opened my phone, wanting to rant to my friend about her brother, but then paused when I saw a text. No, there was no way that this was real.
Unknown: Hello Lena, oh how I’ve missed you
There was no number attached to it and no name. From the nickname used, I had an idea of who it could be. But there was no way that he could be texting me. He was behind cell bars in a concrete fortress where he would not see the light of day for another thirty years.
I deleted the message and pocketed my phone, pretending I had not seen this.
It wasn’t real. Those were the three words that I repeated in my head over and over again. I hoped that if I said it enough times, then it would make it true.
Chapter five
Run Sel Run
Selena
Isleptlikeabsoluteshit last night. My mind was assaulted with old memories of my life before I moved to Chicago. Marcus was the star of my nightmares that replayed in my mind all night. I had done my best to keep myself calm, but every time I closed my eyes, I would hear his voice and feel the ghost of his touch on my skin.
It all made my skin crawl. I was at the point where I wanted to bathe in bleach, trying to remove all remnants of him.
The last time I had even spoken of Marcus, let alone thought of him, was that day when I went to the ER and saw Seb. Claire’s husband was the doctor on call last year when I went in for some unusual bleeding. I had to tell him about my traumatic past, and he promised to keep it private. Marcus was not a topic of conversation that I liked to bring up. No one knew of him. Not even my two best friends, Amelia and Claire—no one. There was a time when Amelia and I hadn’t been so close when she was wrapped up in her ex and all his life dramas. I had been lonely, and Marcus, well, he had been there.
My mother had just died, my best friend wasn’t available for me, and I was…vulnerable. He filled a need of mine for a time. I was confused that the need he met for me was love, but by the time I realized it was too late. I was too far in, and the bruises had already formed on my skin.
I had left him behind in the ashes of the past I had burnt down to the ground, but like a phoenix, he had risen from those charred remains. Or at least I believed it to be him.
I pulled the blankets off my body and got dressed. Enough of wallowing. I had work today, and the last thing I needed to do was bring up the past again.
I needed a run.
I always loved the fall. I don’t know if it is the changing colors of the leaves or the chill in the air. The green turns to a different array of yellows, browns, and yellows. The air is cool enough, so my morning runs don’t feel heated and labored. And the fall fashion doesn’t hurt. I loved layering cozy sweaters and my leather boots.
And this time of year is my favorite because it means that the holidays are not too far away. Unlike my beautiful Claire, I didn’t grow up on the fancy side of Braven. I wasn’t in the middle-class area like Amelia either. I grew up on the other side of town. Many called them the slums, but I called it home. My father was nonexistent, but my mom did her best to ensure that everything essential was provided for. I never had much in this life, but she never really made me feel like I was lacking anything because she so loved me.
I pushed the foyer door open to the cool Chicago morning air. I took a deep breath, allowing my lungs to fill with freshness. After such a horrendous night, I needed this. I stretched my legs and prepared my body for the run I was about to put it through.
It wasn’t that I loved running, but more so I loved that it cleared my head. When I was running, I could forget the outside world and focus on the burn and the pain in my legs. I loved that I could push my body to the limit and unlock a new level of strength and endurance. Running made me feel stronger where I had once been weak.
I walked three blocks from my building to Mangrove Park. I loved starting my run there because I got to go around the pond and see central Chicago waking up. Most people would hate to live in the middle of the city due to all the noise, but I loved it. The silence unnerved me.
When I reached my usual starting bench, I took off running. I pushed my legs as fast as they could carry me, making sure I put everything I could into my muscles. I had so many pent-up frustrations that it was best to empty it all now instead of heading to work with all of this bottled inside. Knowing me, if Lisa were to say one wrong thing, I was likely to swing. I would enjoy every second of that outburst. I would even go as far as to call it therapeutic.
I sprinted the last few meters as my starting bench came into view. The blood rushed through my body as I pumped harder until I finally came to a grinding halt. I bent over and put my hands on my knees, trying to catch my breath.
The lactic acid coated my muscles, searing my flesh, but that kind of burn was so good. The endorphin high was one I always loved after a good run. I had worked myself and pushed my body to the absolute limit.
This was exactly what I needed.
The wind picked up, acting like a fan for my hot face. I breathed in and out deeply, trying to regain full control of my body.
Storms were brewing in my life, and I had to be prepared for what was to come. I had weathered this very hurricane once before, and I would do the same again if it was true and he was back. But this time, I was stronger. I knew better, and I was no longer the scared little girl who hid and curled up in a little ball in the corner. Even though I didn’t feel like it, I was better, and he could not take that power away from me.
I turned, ready to head back to my apartment, but then I stopped short when I saw a familiar face walking toward me. When his eyes connected with mine, his eyes flared, and his mouth parted slightly in shock.
“Are you following me, Abrams?” He said when he got close enough.
My oh my. This man was dressed so deliciously that I felt all the blood rush down to my core. It had been such a long time since I got any action, so it was no wonder even the slightest things turned me.
He wore a tight compression long-sleeved shirt and grey sweatpants. His hair was a little damp from sweat, and his eyes were this emerald green as they reflected the sunlight.
