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“Myapartment is upstairs.”
“Convenient.Rightin the middle of everything.”
Jaymade a few polite inquiries, all appropriate for two people who grew up in the same circle.Hisimpeccable class was effortless, and he never failed to deliver on his refined manners.
Dadiwould’ve wanted me to marry someone like him,Icouldn’t help thinking with a defeated sigh.
IfIhad gotten pregnant with this man’s baby,Iwouldn’t be gorging on oversized pie slices.Hewas born to be a father; loving, nurturing, dependable, trustworthy, even-tempered with a stable career.He’dset an excellent example for any child.
Thethought sent me down a depressive spiral.Itwas all the thingsAxelwasn’t.Axelhated family values and kids.Hementioned it multiple times during our time together.Mythroat constricted at the idea ofAxelrejecting my little poppy seed.
Afterfinding outIwas pregnant withAxel’sbaby,Ihad considered driving toChateauat theHempstead.Apit in my stomach, a gut feeling, stopped me.
Instead,Iended up doing an intensive search on whether psychopaths could love their children.Therewere various platforms where psychopaths could answer anonymously, and a few chose to do so.
Oneof them said, andIquote, “No,Ido not love my children, butImake them believe thatIdo.”
Anothersaid he viewed his children as possession, his to do as he pleased, and cared for them the way he would any other piece of property.
Theresponses left me shuddering to my core.Youhad to nurture something fragile like a poppy seed and fill it with love.ButAxelwouldn’t love my little poppy seed; it was a quality he didn’t possess.Atmost,Axelwould be proud of them if they met his expectations.
Buthe’d never love them.
Themoment everyone found out thatIwas knocked up by a man like him—one who, on paper, was a carbon copy of my rotten ex-boyfriends—my family would also cut me out of their lives.Itwas the one thingMomhad repeatedly asked me not to do.Don’tget pregnant by one of those useless boys.
Well, so much for that.I’dbe ostracized and cast out from my family, and all for a man who had no interest in having a family or loving my child.
Itried to nod asJaykept talking, even thoughIwas consumed with worry over poppy seed’s uncertain future.
Jaynoticed. “Ihave never seen you so quiet,” he said suddenly.
Iwanted to give him a reassuring smile to dismiss his concerns but couldn’t muster it.
Jayappeared suspicious of my demeanor. “Iseverything okay,Piya?”
Ishook my head, squashing the overwhelming urge to cry.
“What'swrong?”Hisarrested voice was low with meaning.
Iblinked, averting his gaze.
Jaymust’ve sensed my dilemma. “Piya, our families have known each other forever.You’veknown me all your life.Youcan tell me anything.Ifyou’re in some kind of trouble…Ican help.”
Intheory,Jaywas right; we grew up in the sameIndiancommunity.However, our lives ran parallel.Hewas older and was in a different clique.Bythe time our age difference didn’t seem so large andJayshowed interest in me,Ihad become engulfed inAxel.Wenever got the timing right.
Nonetheless,Ihad known this man all my life.CouldItrust him with this secret of mine?Jaywasn’t the type to blab, and he was immensely mature.Perhapshe could help me find a way out of this mess.
“Isthat a serious offer?”
Hisnod was curt, a tentative request for me to continue.
“I’mpregnant,”Iblurted.
IfJaywas shocked, he refused to let it show. “I’mguessing there is more,” he said without skipping a bit.Theguy was unshakable and stable to the core.
Inodded my head and started listing my sins in order.
Islept with a tattooed bad boy after swearing them off.
