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I watch his eyes run up and down her body. “Yeah, you look like it. See you then,” he says.
He continues in the other direction, stopping to turn and check out her ass before disappearing into his classroom, and my blood boils.
Then, it hits me.
Someone who deserves it.
Isit on my bed with my sketchbook in my lap, drawingthemagain—the people without faces, as Devon calls them. I call them the kids that he actually wanted or the family he chose. Sometimes, I call them brother and sister or by their names. I hate that I know them. I hate that I can’t seem to draw anything else right now. My mom and I never asked for anything, and they goteverything. I would have settled for scraps. I’d take phone calls and lunch dates and call it good enough because it would be better than being thrown in the trash.
Since learning about them, I often think about what it would be like to be a big sister. Kids have a lot of love to give, and I bet they’d be happy to have one. Sometimes, I picture ringing the doorbell at their home and little footsteps running to greet me and then throwing their arms around my neck. Then, I’d go upstairs and read them books, play with dinosaurs, and have tea parties. Maybe my stepmom wouldn’t like me, butshe’d realize that I could be helpful. She’d let me take them for ice cream and eat dinner with them.
Fuck, I need to get out of my head. Usually, when Grace and Mark go out of town and leave me with Darci, I’m able to do that. I can relax at her house. I can sleep.
I think I made a mess of that.
I hear the doorbell ring and race down the staircase, hoping to get there before Grace and Mark have the opportunity to invite her in.
Of course, I’m not so lucky.
“Darci, come on in,” my uncle says, leaning in to hug my friend.
The sight makes the hair on the back of my neck stand on end.
“Darci, you look beautiful as always, Sweetheart,” Grace says. “So grown up.”
“Thank you,” she says. “And Grace, I signed up to volunteer at the daycare after choir every week this month.”
“Oh, that’s wonderful!” she says.
“Ally, you should do it, too,” Darci says.
“Oh, I think Ally needs the sermons more,” Grace says. “You know she grew up without church in her life. And it takes a certain personality to work with children. You need to be…warm, caring, and, well, more like you, Darci.”
“Yeah, you know me,” I say, “cold and negligent. I’m ready to go if you are, Darci.”
Grace shoots me a look that tells me I’ll pay for that one later, but I know I’ll be paying regardless, so I don’treally care.
“Did you pack a bathing suit?” Darci asks. Her eyes run down my body, taking in my black joggers, high tops, and an oversized band tee.
“No,” I tell her. “I thought I’d just hang out. I…don’t know how to swim.”
“Oh…okay. Cool.”
“So, you guys have the pool open already, Darci?” Mark asks.
“Yep,” she says. “We’ve got it up to eighty-five degrees. It’s warmer in the water than it is outside.”
“Well, maybe I’ll have to come over for a swim, too,” he says.
“I’ll tell my mom,” she smiles.
“You ready?” I press.
“Yeah, let’s go.”
“We’ll be back tomorrow afternoon by four or so; just make sure you have her back in time for dinner,” Grace says. “We’re going to eat at six thirty. You’re welcome to join us.”
“Oh, that’d be great!” she says. “Maybe I will.”
