AllFreeNovel
Share Us
“Does that mean I don’t deserve to be happy?”
“Of course not.” I sighed and turned in his arms, my cheek resting on his warm shoulder. “I just thought you enjoyed that part of this life you’ve got going on.”
“I do.” He paused, tipping his head to the side and resting his chin on my head. “I did. Shit. Any man in the world would call me fucking insane for what I’m about to say, but… that shit gets old, Elmer.”
“In what way?”
“I don’t get to do this,” he stated, his free hand sweeping over us in a gesture. “There’s no familiarity. No intimacy. It’s impersonal. I fuck a chick, go home, and still have no one to talk to about the shit that happened. With you, I can fuck you senseless, sleep, wake up and do it again, but I can also hold you in my arms and tell you every bit of the shit I’ve gone through, not only on that day, but from the past, too. I told you my darkest fucking secrets the first night I met you. You’re the only chick I’ve ever told. Did you know that?”
I’d had no idea, and I shook my head in response, not wanting to stop this open dialogue he had going on.
“You make me feel comfortable.”
I wasn’t sure that was a compliment. What woman wanted to hear they were comfortable? To be called sexy, beautiful, yes. To be loved or adored, of course. To be comfortable? I wasn’t sure it hit the target he’d intended it to.
“You don’t like that,” he said with a quiet laugh. “It’s a compliment, Elmer. I can be myself with you. I don’t have to beonall the time. You know me, who I am, what a fuck up I can be. You understand I say stupid shit, and you call me out on it. You’re the best sex I ever fucking had, and I still learn more about your body every time I’m inside you. I like talking to you. I value your opinion. Do you know how fucking rare that is?”
I shook my head before realizing I needed to respond verbally. “What are you saying, Noah?”
“Come stay with me. I’m not going to say, move in or make this permanent. I’m saying let’s experiment, try a few things, and see what works for us.”
“I’m starting a company.”
“I know,” he said, pushing up and redirecting a few strands of my hair with his fingers. “Hence the trial period. We can get you set up down here if it works.”
“You’re serious.”
Noah smiled.
“Noah, your team will not be on board with this.”
“Fuckmy team,” he spat with venom. “They forget I’m a human being. They have no fucking idea how lonely it is being America’s golden boy.”
“You’re a crazy son-of-a-bitch.”
“Is that a yes?”
I lifted my head and studied his face, the pleading look in his eyes tugging at my heart. The request felt as though it had come out of the blue. We’d never spoken much about ourselves as a couple in the past. We’d just lived it together then gone our separate ways, and now… now, he wanted to talk about making whatever this was permanent.
I loved Noah, and I had since the moment I’d met him. I had loved him all the time I’d been in college, even when I’d been with Eric. Even since graduation, where he’d shown up and sat with my family and friends, I’d loved him enough never to allow myself to become attached to any man I’d invited to enter my bed, but to risk all of that and make it, make us, a thing felt risky.
“What are you thinking?” he asked, teasing a strand of my red hair with a tug.
“Weighing the risks.”
“Talk to me.”
“What if it doesn’t work?”
“It’ll work.”
“Okay, but if it doesn’t, I lose you.”
“What are you saying, Elmer? You love me?”
I gave him a look. “If you don’t know that by now, you’re a bigger idiot than the tabloids accuse you of being.”
“Damn, you can be cruel.”
