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“Why give her the opportunity to hurt me more?” Sam spat out. “You saw her reaction back there—like I was the worst sort of scum.”
“Yeah, but unlike you, I spoke to her,” I said, giving her a pointed look. “I’m not going to make you do anything because I’m not in your position. I haven’t lived your life, and I can’t imagine how horrible it feels to lose your family because of who you are. I’m just telling you the chance might be there to get one member back.”
Sam sucked in a deep breath. “I’ll try. I don’t want you to lose your best friend too, just because I can’t face my demons.”
I threaded my fingers through hers, squeezing her hand in mine. As much as we needed to head to my apartment, I didn’t want to leave the perfection of this moment. Of the bright sunlit sky overhead, the city that had welcomed me carved across the horizon, and the woman I loved sitting beside me. I breathed in the clove, exhaust, and metal, loving how they made my senses spark to life.
Loving the way Sam Taylor made me feel.
“All right, let’s go,” I said finally, breaking the gentle quiet between us.
When we arrived at my apartment, we’d find out if I still had a best friend.
Chapter Sixteen
Sam
Icouldn’t believe I was willingly going back to Amelia’s apartment after I’d bolted.
However, three little words made a world of difference.
Learning that Ames loved me? Hell, I’d confront my parents for this woman. And a small part of me needed to know what had happened all those years. Why Nina was okay with Ames being gay but not me.
Ames held my hand tight the whole way, but as we stopped in front of her apartment door, both of us were buzzing. Because there was always the chance Nina hadn’t stayed. That she’d cut Ames out as well as me. If that were the case, I didn’t know how I’d process. Ames might not hold the outcome against me, but the guilt would fucking bury me.
“I’m opening my door,” she warned me, her keys jangling in her free hand.
When she cracked it wide, my gaze landed on Ames’s sofa—and the person still sitting there.
Nina hadn’t left.
My chest squeezed tight, and the familiar panic fluttered through my veins, but this time I wasn’t running. Ames’s hand in mine kept me grounded as we approached, a united front. She loved me. She’d chosen me. I could barely believe it, but I knew from the moment she crash-landed back into my life what a treasure this woman was. I sure as hell wasn’t going to give her up.
“I only have one question,” Nina said, her eyes sharp. “Why did you leave?”
I sucked in a shaky breath. Looked like we were going to dive in. I let go of Amelia’s hand, even though I wanted to keep holding it. Nina and I needed to have this conversation, though, and I couldn’t rely on Ames here. I settled onto the couch beside my sister, and Ames found a spot on her loveseat.
“I didn’t have a choice,” I said. “Mom and Dad said that as long as I was a queer, I didn’t have a place in the family.”
Nina flinched as if I’d slapped her.
Silence descended between us, but she wasn’t speaking. She also wasn’t leaving, so I wasn’t sure what to make of the situation.
I stared at my thighs. Amelia’s presence next to me was pure sunlight I grasped onto, if only to fight the darkness threatening to tug me under. Finally, a small exhale came from Nina.
When I looked up, Nina’s eyes were glossed over with tears.
“I should’ve known,” she said, her voice cracking. The first tears slipped down her cheeks. “They told me you’d gotten into drugs, that you didn’t want to be around us anymore.”
Anger flared through me fast and fierce, but the sight of my sister’s tears quenched it just as fast, leaving a bitter ache in its wake.
Our parents had lied to her.
The missing piece clicked into place, but what remained was this hollow grief of the years we’d lost. All because of those lies. Nina had only been a kid. Of course she’d believed them.
“You couldn’t have known.” I needed to reassure her. The sight of her there, tears streaming down her face vaulted me back ten years. This was my baby sister, the one I’d taken care of as an infant. I’d changed her diapers, sung her to sleep. I’d read her stories and played tea parties with her, even though I’d been way older. We’d never been close like siblings who’d grown up side by side, but I’d been her protector.
Not being able to check in to see how she was doing all these years had gutted me.
