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It was petty as fuck. I knew that, yet I couldn’t bring myself to care. I needed to make Jamie forget all about my hot-headed reaction to her date, and more than that, I wanted to see if she had a reaction to what I was about to do, too.
I needed to know if I was burning alone or if Jamie was standing right beside me.
The idea of someone else’s dirty hands all over her had me craving destruction. I should find out who the lucky fucker was, make him pay for trying to take what could never be his.
There was this sickening image constantly wreaking havoc in my mind – candles, flowers, wine, all of it thrown at her in a fake parade of chivalry, just for a chance to get into her pants. I will be standing outside her door tonight making sure that doesn't happen.
I fought the urge to order Jimmy to send a shadow to her place. Mission? Scare off any dumb fuck who dared to step too close for comfort.
Fuck, fuck, fuck. Get a fucking grip! She’s just some pussy you haven’t tasted. Absolutely nothing else.
I tried repeating that in a loop. The forbidden fruit was always the sweetest, the grass was always greener on the other side, we always want what we can’t have, bla bla fucking bla. Lies, all of it! She was so much more than that.
I bit my bottom lip, almost drawing blood as I sat behind my desk, watching as she settled into hers. I had that desk vacated for Jamie on purpose so I could watch her or shut the door when I couldn’t handle it.
Jamie smiled at her phone as she tapped on the screen, probably texting her date, and that alone was enough for me to lose it.
“Michelle,” I called out, walking towards my door, loosening my tie, and unbuttoning the two top stranglers of my shirt. I plastered a mischievous smile on my lips, waiting for her, watching as she sashayed her way over. She knew what that smile meant, and she was all for it. I didn’t spare Jamie a single glance, yet I knew she was watching. I could feel the heat of her stare on me.
Michelle swayed her way over to my office as sexily as she could, just as all the other times. I greeted her with a devilish smile as she arrived at my door, closing it straight behind her.
We had done this a few times before. She was always up for it, too. Michelle let her hair fall loose from the all-professional updo she had going on, shaking her head, spreading all the strands for me to grab at will. I hesitated halfway and let my hand fall back to my side.
Michelle’s hand ran the length of my chest, prying its way under my shirt as she opened it up, feeling every muscle while the other reached for my face.
She was hot as fuck. Everyone with eyes had to admit to that, yet today, all this, her hands, her hungry eyes, was doing absolutely nothing for me. She wasn’t sparking the need to fuck her right here on my desk as she once had.
My mind was firmly set on the brunette on the other side of that closed door, the notion that she’d be doing this with some dumb-fuck tonight deflating any arousal still left in me.
FUCK. FOCUS!
Michelle’s hand reached down between us to grip my cock, finding herself surprised to feel it soft. She stopped, her brows furrowed in confusion as she intently studied my face before stretching to kiss me. On instinct, I turned my face, and her kiss landed on my cheek. I thought I could do this, but something in me was screaming about how wrong it was.
“Liam?” Michelle asked. I could read between those lines. There was soft confusion on her face but what she really wanted to ask was “What the fuck?”
“What?” I grunted angrily, pulling her hands from my face and groin. Her lipstick had smudged all over her lips with the sudden graze on my cheek. On any other given Monday, that sight would have done it for me. I’d never have another normal fucking Monday in my life.
“Is everything okay?” NO! Everything is not fucking okay. I can’t even get off because of her. This has never happened before, how can everything fucking be okay?
“Yes, fine,” I replied instead. “I have work to do. You can go.” I coldly dismissed her, Michelle’s face twisting into a puzzled expression. “Today.” I grunted as she took a little too long to follow through.
I’m a fucking idiot.
I watched her as she opened the door while fixing her hair and cleaning off what she could of her smudged lipstick. This had achieved absolutely nothing, so I turned towards my desk and let my body heavily fall onto the leather chair. My head sprung up as soon as I heard Michelle’s pissed-off voice, “What? Don’t you have work to do? Mind your own business.”
She finally left my office, the view now completely unobstructed. I was faced with wide brown eyes, a slightly ajar mouth, and the expression I was craving to see plastered on that angelic face.
Jamie was hurt, and fuck did I feel like shit in my own delight.
Jamie
Right then and there, I knew just how deep in trouble I was.
It was clear I had nothing to hold on to, if for some fucked up reason I still had my hopes up before.
From the looks of it, there was a very intimate reason why Michelle was Liam’s fan “numero uno,” as Alison had put it. They surely knew each other better than I had thought.
I fought back the urge to scream that came with the burning tears I didn’t allow to fall. I had no right to feel this way. Liam wasn’t my anything, I had no claim over him and no say in who he kissed, fucked, or loved.
