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Weeks since I last held you: 16
Weeks Pregnant: 20
Baby size: Banana
Today I had to allow a venomous bitch to press her lips to my cheek while she pawed her hands all over me in front of you while I called your pussy ozone waste. It chipped another part of my heart away.
The words are never for you—they’re for her. Anything I’ve said to hurt you since the horrible day I had to announce her as our Chosen has been for her.
“Wes. You in here, man?” Owen shouts, rapping his knuckles against my bedroom door.
He doesn’t wait for an answer before he turns the knob, and I slam my journal shut. All my words are only for her. They convey what I can’t say out loud.
It started a week after she was gone. I could still smell her on my pillow. I stare at the drawer where the ziplock bag holds the pillowcase.
“Didn’t you hear me calling you?” Owen asks, standing in the doorway.
I pull my eyes from the brown leather-bound journal, turning to peer at him. “Sorry, I was focused on something. I didn’t hear you. What’s up?”
He doesn’t attempt to see what I’m doing. He already knows—they all do. “Lev wants to meet before the party starts.”
“I’ll be down in fifteen.”
Owen nods, then closes my door.
Spinning back around, I open to the page bookmarked and pick up where I left off.
Every part of me aches for you—wanting nothing more than to fist your hair and make you a beautiful mess. My perfect dirty slut.
I don’t know if I’ll ever share this with you, but I needed a place to show you my heart beats only for you. If you can never forgive me when all of this is over, please forgive them. It was my decision to choose Samantha. And even if it’s a choice I’d make every time, I’m destroyed knowing it hurt you.
Love Always,
Wes
Song: Sad Beautiful Tragic- Taylor Swift
Inhaling, I place my pen down and close my eyes. I try to make peace with who I’ve had to be to Ariah, knowing she may never forgive me. Even when she discovers it was all to keep her safe and save Owen, I don’t see how she’ll ever look at me the same.
My dreams are haunted by the pained look on her face each time one of us does something. I only find solace in the fact it’s almost over. Teagan has found a way into the device. Now, she’s working tirelessly to develop a code to override the chip in Owen’s arm. We’re so close I can almost taste Ariah’s skin.
Standing, I open my wall safe and place the journal back inside. The lock engages, sealing my private thoughts behind biometric security features. Then I walk over to my bed, tempted to pull out the pillowcase, but I know I’m short on time. Instead, I leave my room and head for Lev’s.
Once I’m seated, he begins. “We’ll all start off here tonight. We need Samantha to remember seeing all of us. Once the party gets crowded, Sebastian, Owen, and I will go to the Fraternitas and meet with Mrs. Davenport.”
“Why don’t I get to stay here,” Owen inquires, sulking.
Lev doesn’t skip a beat. “You’ll kill Samantha if you’re here. There’s no way she’ll behave with an audience this big, knowing we’re being forced to make it appear as if she’s our actual fiancée.”
When I look, Owen’s guilt is written all over his devilish grin.
“Exhibit A,” Sebastian jests.
Huffing, Owen mumbles but agrees.
“I’ll have a feed of the party up the whole time. All rooms upstairs will be locked, and we’ll have security guarding the basement and stairway,” Lev explains.
“Can’t let anyone in your torture room,” Wyatt snorts.
