Page 50 of Pity Party


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“I might do a little shopping for myself while we’re there,” Melissa declares before telling me, “They have a seating area with extremely comfortable chairs. You can sit and enjoy the piano player while we shop.”

“They have their own piano player? That sounds pretty fancy.”

Melissa laughs. “It’s probably to soothe shoppers into a trance, so they don’t realize how much money they’re spending.”

“If it was a commercial,” Sammy wants to know, “what music would you play?” She turns to Melissa and explains, “My dad’s in marketing and he comes up with advertising concepts.”

Melissa smiles, but she doesn’t seem overly impressed. Turning my attention to Sam, I tell her, “‘Money, Money, Money’ by Abba.”

“Oh, that’s a good one. What music would you play for our lunch?”

“That’s easy,” I tell her. “‘Cheeseburger in Paradise.’” I’m not a huge Jimmy Buffett fan, but there’s something about that song that makes me want to pack my flip flops and head for Hawaii.

Our conversation remains easy until our lunch arrives. Then between bites, Sammy talks to Melissa. “What kind of clothes are you going to buy?”

“Dating clothes.” She replies, and I nearly choke on a chip.

“Fun!” My daughter is clearly enthused by the concept. “So, sexy dresses that hug all your curves?” I start to cough.

“Something like that,” Melissa says while seeming to wonder if she needs to give me the Heimlich maneuver.

“I’m sure Tim will appreciate them,” Sammy says.

“Let’s hope.”

“You’d better get my dad’s opinion. Even though he’s going to stay single forever, he’s still a man.”How flattering.

“I’d be happy to offer my services,” I tell Melissa. As much as I don’t want to imagine her on a date with another guy, I’m not going to ask her out. Also, it’s the least I can do after she took a whole day to help Sammy.

“Well, okay. Thank you.” Had the woman not kissed me like she’d been stranded on a deserted island, and I was her rescuer, I would have never known she was attracted to me. But of course, it’s possible that after my rejection she no longer is.

As we eat, our arms continue to brush against each other, causing a hyperawareness that borders on agonizing. Melissa and Sammy talk about everything from school to clothes, to navigating the minefield of the junior high school social order.

I simply sit and enjoy their camaraderie. Melissa’s counsel is exactly what my daughter needs right now.

I have to remind myself more than once that she’snotwhat I need, because I’m not looking to get involved with anyone until my daughter is older. But if I were …

CHAPTERTWENTY

MELISSA

To say today was excruciating would be an understatement of epic proportion. Not only did I kiss Jamie, a man who wants nothing to do with me, but I sat next to him all the way to Milwaukeeandat lunch. Thankfully, I rode in the back seat on the way home.

If that weren’t enough, he insisted on camping right outside the dressing room so he could critique Sammy’s and my outfit choices. As punishment, I made it my mission to try on every drop-dead sexy dress I could find in my size. If he’s going to torture me, I’m going to return the favor.

Not surprisingly, Jamie found something wrong with every dress I put on, including my favorite—a hot pink number with an off-the-shoulder ruffled neckline. He said it showed too much, which is ridiculous because my cleavage wasn’t on display, and the skirt was full. As a joke, I tried on one of those Amish-looking numbers that’s so in style right now. He claimed to love it.

Instead of taking Jamie’s advice and buying the fresh-off-the-prairie number, I purchased three highly gorgeous dresses that I would have never considered had I not been antagonized into doing so.

Sammy bought two more outfits, two pairs of shoes, and some makeup at the Clinique counter. She went well over budget, but her dad seemed genuinely happy about her enthusiasm, so he just smiled and handed over his credit card. I would have loved it if my dad had shown a similar interest in me. And while I always knew he loved me and my brother, who spent what on us was an ongoing struggle during our childhood. As in,it’s not my turn to buy Missy and Joe shoes, orisn’t that supposed to be covered in my child support payment?At times we felt like we were pets that neither of them wanted.

As soon as Jamie and Sammy dropped me off at my apartment, I changed into my shorty pajamas and called to have Chinese takeout delivered. While sitting on my couch eating kung pao shrimp and scrolling through the Catch.com website, I’m starting to think Tim is the only reasonable match for me.

I’m so distracted by the world class weirdos looking for love that when my phone rings, I don’t even look to see who’s calling before answering it. “Hello?”

“Hey, Missy, it’s Tim.”Speak of the devil.

I stop reading Made for You’s profile. “What’s up?”

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