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I’m not going to mosey into that minefield, so I don’t comment. Instead, I go with, “I never realized how cutthroat these shows are behind the scenes.”
Paige slides down into her chair in a pose of defeat. “And this is one of the nicer shows. Can you imagine what it’s like on the ones that encourage people to get drunk and sleep around?”
“LikeSex Kitten!” Cami declares excitedly. “Did you hear whathappened to the couple who were supposed to get married last year?”
Paige nods her head while I shake mine. Paige explains, “They signed on to do a reality show about their wedding so the whole thing was televised. The guy started cheating and everything blew up when they were at the altar.”
Cami takes over. “When the minister asked if there were any objections, the maid of honor raised her hand and told the bride she was in love with the groom. She said she couldn’t live with herself if she didn’t tell him before he married—wait for it—her sister!”
“That’s disgusting.” I can’t imagine sitting around watching drivel like that.
“That’s why I came onMidwestern Matchmaker,” Cami says. “I want real love and not just some ‘wham, bam, thank you, ma’am’ ratings-boosting kind of thing.”
“Me too,” Paige agrees. Then she looks at me and decides to stir the pot. “Isn’t that why you came on, Tim?”
I shoot daggers at her before pressing the mute button on my microphone. I indicate they should do the same. Paige shows Cami where the button is, and once we’re all safely silenced, I answer Paige’s question. “You know full well why I agreed to come on this show.”
Cami looks between us like I’m about to spill some excellent tea, so I turn my attention to her. “I agreed to doMidwestern Matchmakerbecause my ex-wife watches, and I wanted her to know how well I was doing without her.”
“You were married?”
“I was. Eva left me for some guy in the NBA.”
She touches the tip of her nose before pointing at me with her other hand. “Holden Jenkins stoleyourwife?”
“You know the story, huh?” A wave of shame washes over me as I realize I should have kept my mouth shut.
Cami touches my arm. “My dad is a huge basketball fan,” sheexplains. “Also, there’s been a lot of press coverage about Holden’s new lady.”
“Eva should be in heaven then. She likes nothing more than to be the center of attention.”How did I ever wind up married to a woman like that?
I see the moment realization hits, and Cami’s face falls. “So, you’re not here to fall in love.”
Before I can answer, Paige says, “Tim and I made a pity pact. We agreed to feel sorry for each other to help ease our burdens so we’re more open to finding love.”
Cami appears to be as confused as I am about what a pity pact is. “I’ve never heard of that before,” she says.
“That’s because I invented it,” Paige says proudly. “Essentially, I’ve agreed to take possession of Tim’s baggage so he can be emotionally lighter and more open to finding someone.”
“And he holds yours,” Cami says.
“He would if I had any,” Paige says.
“You have to have baggage,” Cami and I declare at the same time.
Paige shrugs. “It’s hard to be burdened by problems like that when I rarely date.”
“And yet you still put dog poop all over some guy’s car,” I remind her. “That sounds like baggage to me.” I don’t mention her obvious issues regarding her past physical disability because that would just be mean.
Paige narrows her gaze in my direction. “Fine, Tim. You can hold the poop bag.”
Cami looks hopeful. “So youareinterested in finding someone, Tim? Are you going to let Paige be mad for you so you can have some fun?”
I lift my right foot and rest it on my left knee. “I think that’s easier said than done.”
“Why?” she wants to know.
“Because you can’t just hand off your anger to another person. It’s something you have to go through on your own.”
