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After all we’d been through together in the last month, I think I deserved a little more than that.
A deep sigh ripped from my lungs, and Audrey glanced over at me. “You okay?”
“I will be.” Once I figured out what I wanted.
But first… I had to get through the rest of this semester.
I was scared if I told him the truth—that I’d wanted him, always, ever since that first night, that I’d get attached. And when something happened, and we inevitably fell apart, I’d be the one picking up the pieces of my shattered heart.
Something I couldn’t deal with again.
Straightening my shoulders, I headed back to the dance floor, in search of astrongglass of punch.
He wanted me, and as much as I hated to admit it to myself, I wanted him too.
CHAPTER 20
Ella
Unfurling my arms, I yawned as I looked at the car packed with our belongings. Fall semester was over, finals were finished, and we were ready to go.
Audrey had volunteered to take the first shift driving up to Vermont, but I wasn’t complaining. It wasn’t super far, but seven hours was a long time to drive straight through.
“Are you sure you two will be okay?” My mom asked on the phone, calling to check in on us after we’d said goodbye to Ilene and the sorority house for break.
“Yes, Mom,” I said, huffing out a little breath of annoyance even though I really loved her. “We’ll be fine. And we’ll be home before Christmas.”
“Okay. Just… call me later? The roads can get icy this time of year.”
“We will, Mom,” I murmured, looking over at Ro. “Love you.” We said our goodbyes, and then I hung up.
“She’s just worried about us, you know.”
I sighed. “I do.”
How could Inotknow? Maybe she was a little overbearing sometimes, but it was how she showed her love. And I loved herfor always making sure we were okay. Even if sometimes I wasn’t okay, and I didn’t know how to lie to her about it.
“Ready to go?” Audrey asked, adjusting her sweater cuffs. It was always weird to see my twin in anything other than a dress. Even in the middle of winter, she’d just pull on fleece-lined tights with her dresses or skirts, so it was jarring when I saw her in jeans. Except…
“Wait.” I frowned. “Are thosemyjeans?” I was pretty sure she didn’t even own a pair. Especially not that specific pair.
“Um… maybe?” She tugged at the neck of her sweater that was adorned with a stripe of white lace on the bottom.
“I would have said yes if you’d asked,” I grumbled. “We’re not even living in the same room anymore! When did you sneak in and take them?”
She laughed. “I have my ways. Come on, let’s hit the road before it gets too late. Do you want coffee?” Audrey asked as she climbed into the driver’s seat.
“Yes. Definitely.” It wasdesperatelyneeded. I was just glad that finals were over and so were all other activities until spring semester started. “I cannot wait for this break.”
From classes. From the sorority, and all of the responsibilities that came with being president. And most of all, from Charming, and the confusing myriad of emotions that came with him.
Especially considering the way he’d texted me every day since the formal, but he’d never pressured me into making a decision. Just sent me little notes to tell me he was thinking about me.
Maybe that was what had me second guessing everything. Because he didn’t fit into any of my pre-conceived notions, and I knew it. So why was it fair that I was holding them against him?
All Cam had ever done was show me that he liked me, that he cared. And what had I done? Pushed him away—ran away? It wasn’t fair to him, and I knew it.
Something I planned on telling him as soon as winter break was over.
