Page 102 of His to Ruin

She’s right. I felt the exact same way.

“Did you sleep with him?”

She nods bowing her head.

“Where did the two of you leave it?”

“The next day he woke up hating me like nothing had ever happened.”

“Ah babe, I’m so sorry.”

“Nothing to be sorry about. I hate him remember?” she says but the hurt look in her eyes tells me she’s lying. They mean more to each other than either of them lets on. I want to tell her about what Caleb said about Saint always protecting her but I don’t. I think this is something she will need to figure out on her own. She needs to come to terms with the feelings she has for him and just take a chance.

“I think maybe you should try to talk to him again and tell him how you really feel.”

“I can’t take another rejection from him Jordin. It hurts too much.”

“Sometimes we have to show our vulnerability and speak our truth Lex, otherwise it will always be a what if.”

She sighs deeply.

“Maybe. I’ll think about it.”

Lexy and I agreed to talk more about this later after the bell rings that lunch is over. Walking away I could tell we were both relieved to have the weight of telling each other off our shoulders. If she gets hurt I’ll be there to hold her and help her through it, the way a best friend should. But I realise that that’s what I need to do also. To take my own advice. I don’t want to be playing these games with him anymore. I’m ready to put myself on the line and admit the truth that I’m falling for him. I want him to crawl into my bed every night scooping me into his big arms spooning me to sleep. I want him to want only me and stop messing around with other girls. I want us. Even if he doesn’t want me back, knowing my heart will break. It’s still worth taking the leap. At least this way I will know one way or the other.

As I near my locker I spot Jason taking some books out from the locker opposite mine. What the hell happened to his face? He’s got two black eyes, a split lip, and a band aid across the bridge of his nose. He looks like he been in a car wreck.

“Jason what happened? Are you okay?”

All the colour from his face drains, suddenly looking around him like a frightened animal about to be cornered.

“I can’t be seen talking to you Jordin. Please walk away and never speak to me again.”

I take a step back in shock at his cutting words. “Don’t talk to you? Why can’t I talk to you?”

He keeps his head down careful not to make eye contact with me.

“Jason I was only just talking to you in Ket….” I cover my mouth with my hand. The truth hitting me like a tidal wave.

“Caleb did this to you didn’t he? He beat you up just for talking to me didn’t he?”

“I have to go,” he says pushing away from me wincing at the movement.

I nod as tears prick the corners of my eyes at the pain he must be in. “I’ll go. I’m so sorry he hurt you,” I tell him with full sincerity.

Pulling out my phone I text Lexy.

Me: I’m so mad right now.

Her response comes in immediately.

Lexy: Why what’s happened????

Me: Because I’m going to ducking kill Caleb that’s why!!

Me: I meant fucking. God I really hate predictive text sometimes.

Lexy: Did he blab?

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