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“It’s alright,” he told her. “Were we happy? Yes and no. My father walked out when I was six and Raina was ten.”
Tildy frowned sympathetically.
“He wasn’t all that into being married.” Hawk cleared his throat awkwardly. “He… wasn’t around a lot. And then one day he just wasn’t around at all. I heard he moved down south. Don’t know where. We never heard from him again.”
Tildy chewed her lower lip. “What did your mother do?”
Hawk shrugged. “Worked two jobs. Did her best. She was always home for a little bit, though, right when we’d get off from school. She’d have something for us, fry bread or cookies, something like that. Then she’d have to get ready for the night shift at the supermarket. Stocking shelves. But, yeah, in the kitchen after school, that was nice. She’d drop us off at Garrett’s house before she went to work. He and I started to get into trouble as we got older, but we were pretty happy.”
A long silence hung between them.
“My dad’s… gone a lot,” she confided.
Hawk scowled.
“It started right after they got married. Maybe even before. That’s why she had me. To see if I could keep him home.”
“But it didn’t work,” he concluded.
Tildy shook her head.
Hawk sighed. “So, she took it out on the only person in the house she could control.”
Tildy shrugged but nodded. “I guess,” she said quietly.
Breaking the tension, Hawk said, “I’m going to take a quick shower.”
He left the living room, leaving Tildy standing awkwardly in the center of the room. Along the wall, a shelf caught her eye, and she wandered over. There were several framed photos on it. Hawk and what looked to be his sister and her kids. Hawk and, presumably, his mother, as well as photo of him with a large group of men wearing matching uniforms. She picked out Shooter, Easy, Doc, and Tex easily. The others she didn’t recognize.
It was so unlike her own home, which had expensive art on the walls, but no photos anywhere. Tildy couldn’t remember any photos ever being taken, except for the professional photographer that came in every Christmas to take the annual family photo. That only made it onto Christmas cards sent out to other people.
Hawk’s house wasn’t precisely cozy in the way she imagined her own home would be one day, but it definitely looked a little more lived-in and therefore more inviting. There was actually a TV, one that wasn’t hidden inside a large cabinet, and a couch that looked infinitely more comfortable than the one her mother had in the living room.
She’d be willing to bet that Hawk didn’t have a small double bed, especially not with a frilly, pink comforter. She blushed furiously; she should not be thinking about Hawk’s bed, especially not when he was in the shower. That only had her blushing even more. Several minutes later, he emerged from the bathroom, and she couldn’t tell whether she was relieved or disappointed that he was dressed in clean clothes. She didn’t have much time to consider it though, because he had come out in a way she hadn’t seen before. All his black hair was loose, wet, and hanging around his shoulders. It shined brightly. He rubbed it with a towel and watched her examining his photographs.
Tearing her gaze away from him, she nodded at the photo in her hand. “Who are the rest of these men?”
Hawk stopped next to her and took the frame from her. His face was solemn, and Tildy got the feeling she shouldn’t have asked. She was about to apologize, when he said, “The rest of our unit. We ran over an IED on a convoy to the next town.”
Tildy’s mouth dropped open. She knew Hawk had been in the Army, but it seemed so vague. Just ‘in the Army.’ She hadn’t spent any time thinking about the fact that it meant ‘gone to war.’
“Chris and Jimmy were in the lead vehicle with some others. It got hit the worst. Chris took a lot of shrapnel. Jimmy actually lost his leg. The others didn’t make it.”
Tildy gasped and felt the blood drain from her face. “Jimmy’s missing a leg?”
Hawk nodded. “The lower half of his right leg. Gone at the knee.”
Tildy sat down on the couch, dazed.
Chapter 28
Hawk watched Tildy process what he was telling her. It bothered him to upset her so much, so he put the picture back on the shelf. He never spoke about what happened after, not to her or his brothers. They never brought up the fact that while Doc and Shooter were tending to Jimmy’s shredded leg, Hawk had been stranded on the other side of the road, pinned down by enemy fire.
Hawk didn’t have first aid supplies, not that it mattered because he didn’t have Doc’s medic experience to use them anyway. What could you do for a man who was actually on fire? There was only one thing you could do, so Hawk did it. Jimmy may have wanted a bullet after looking down and seeing most of his leg gone, but Jason had actually gotten one- from Hawk’s .44.
