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His mouth twists in a smirk. “Look who’s talking about sad.”
When he cranes his neck like he’s trying to look around me, I turn and touch the button on the back of the TV to turn it off. “What is that supposed to mean?” I demand through gritted teeth.
“Nothing. Turn the TV back on.”
“Don’t bullshit me. What are you talking about? What’s sad?”
He purses his lips before opening the pizza box and pulling out a slice of pepperoni. He takes his time raising it to his lips, then chews slowly. I have nowhere else to be at the moment, so I wait, tapping my foot.
Finally, he swallows. “I’m just saying, if I want to date a woman, I want it to be one-on-one. Otherwise, I’m only second-best.” He cocks an eyebrow my way. “Or is it the third best?”
I once had a bucket of ice water dumped over my head as a prank. I’ll never forget the sudden shock of mind-numbing cold washing over me. It feels a lot like that now, only there’s not a drop of water in sight. “Excuse me?”
“I just want to know how you face those guys all the time. Like, you watch each other have sex with the same girl, right? That’s what your text messages said, the ones you guys were sharing back-and-forth in your group chat.” Every word widens his smirk until he’s grinning from ear to ear.
“You son of a bitch.” Forget being kind. Forget patience. I’m going to rip this kid’s head off. “You went through my text messages?”
“You leave your phone sitting around all the time. And yeah, a message came through one night when you were in the shower, and I picked it up to look. Big deal.”
“When was this?”
“I don’t know. Right after I got here. That was some pretty spicy stuff.” He snickers at the sight of my shock, then shakes his head. “You’re a freak. So don’t stand there and lecture me about my life when yours is a goddamn mess. You don’t even have enough self-respect to want a woman all for yourself.”
“You don’t know the first thing about me or that relationship.”
“Oh, relationship? That’s a funny word for it. Seems more like a gangbang to me.”
“Yeah, it would, because you’re a stupid fucking kid who doesn’t know any better. And now you’re sitting there, in my home, insulting me? No way. You’re out of here.”
“I’m what?” At least he’s shocked. That snide, know it all attitude is gone.
“You heard me. I want you out. You think you can sit there and disrespect me after going through my personal messages, and I’m going to let you stay here? Think again.”
“Where am I supposed to go?”
“I thought you had it all figured out. I want you out of my house, and out of my life. Starting now.” I knock the pizza box off the coffee table in passing. “And pick this shit up.”
15
HARLOW
Ienjoy swimming during the day. I’m sure that doesn’t make me unique – lots of people like swimming during the day, escaping the heat. But night swims are quickly becoming my favorite. I don’t know what it is. A way of relaxing and connecting with my body after a long day, I guess. Letting the water carry me after I’ve spent hours carrying myself.
Granted, my life isn’t exactly physically exhausting right now. I’m not going to the office, I’m not running from class to class like I used to back in the day. There’s no tight schedule to adhere to. I used to collapse out of sheer exhaustion at night when I was in school. Kyle was not a fan, but then Kyle wasn’t a fan of a lot of things. Like being a faithful boyfriend, for starters.
Now, my time is my own, and I can let the water support me as I float on my back while using the motion from my hands and arms to keep me more or less in the center of the pool. The sky is so full of stars, it’s enough to make my heart ache. It’s times like this when I have to wonder if we are really alone in the universe. How can we be? What are the odds of there not being a singleintelligent life form out there when every single one of those stars could represent a sun like ours?
In other words, I’ve been doing a lot of deep, but not necessarily important thinking. It’s actually been kind of nice. After years spent struggling to balance my studies and a part-time job and what passes for a personal life, I could use the break. No, it hasn’t shown up the way I’d like it to. Nobody wants to be forced into staying home and getting some rest. But it’s still nice, and I’ve managed to unwind.
I just wish unwinding paid the bills. I’m still in good shape, though – growing up a teacher’s kid, I learned the value of a dollar and how to budget like my life depends on it. It does, really. Once my paychecks stop coming in, I’ll have to lean on my skills.
If only there were an answer somewhere up there to the concerns still weighing heavily on me. What if I called the coach and surprised him into talking with me? Like, maybe I could startle him into a conversation, catch him off-guard. I looked up the results of tonight’s game and was happy to see the Raptors came out on top. He’s bound to be in a good mood after that. Maybe…
There’s noise at the gate. Noise that makes my heart forget to beat. I freeze, uncertain, before it sounds like somebody’s trying to open the latch I made sure was locked before I got in the water.
“Harlow? Are you out here?”
It’s Ryder. My heart unclenches, but only for a second before another, bigger concern looms in front of me, he soundsterrible. The word upset doesn’t begin to describe it. Distraught is more like it.
