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I walk over to the side of the bed, staring down at the tiny person she’s holding. “Wow.”
“Right?”
“She’s perfect, Syd.”
My sister smiles. “I think so. You want to hold her?”
“Uh.” I clear my throat. “Sure.”
Sydney carefully transfers the baby to my arms. She’s lighter than I’m expecting. And warmer. I can feel the heat of her skin through the cotton blanket she’s swaddled in.
“Does she have a name yet?”
“No. I thought I’d know once I looked at her. But so far, nothing.”
I swallow and nod, tucking her blanket beneath my arm.
“Where’s Cassia?”
“She’s here. She just, um, she wanted to give us a minute.” I sigh, staring down at the peaceful features of my niece. “I, um…”
“Did you guys win the game? I saw some of the texts, then got distracted.” Sydney nods toward her daughter, smiling.
“Yeah, we won. But I—Syd, she’s gone.”
I watch those words slowly register on my sister’s face.
“What? How do you know?”
“Her doctor came and told me. It happened tonight.”
She exhales and looks away.
“I’m sorry, Syd.”
“Why are you apologizing? Don’t apologize.”
“I just—it’s shitty timing. Obviously.”
Sydney is quiet for several minutes. I rock the baby, relieved she keeps sleeping. Giving her time to absorb the news on what’s already been a crazy night.
“Do you think it’s weird if I name her Lana?” she asks suddenly.
I glance up, taken aback. “The baby? Name her after Mom?”
“I’ve always thought it was a pretty name. And I…you were right. She was our mom. Whatever her flaws and mistakes, that was always true. Maybe she’s in a better place now. Maybe she’s with Dad, before everything between them got messed up. Either way, she’s gone. Maybe this is a fresh start. I was going to name her Joseph, after Dad, if she’d been a boy.”
“I don’t think it’s weird,” I say. I’ve thought, since my dad died, that I’d probably name a son after him too. “I think she would have been touched. She just wouldn’t have known how to tell you that.”
Sydney sniffles. “Yeah.”
The baby—Lana—blinks. “She’s waking up,” I say.
Sydney holds her arms out. “I’ll take her. Can you go get Cassia? And Harrison if he wants to come back in?”
“Yeah, of course.”
I hand my niece back, then head for the door. Sneak one glance back at Sydney staring down at her daughter.
