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“I’ve learned to love myself more,” I informed him. “That’s what guys like you and Cap have taught me. I need to learn to love myself more, or else I’ll always end up with a broken heart.”
“I love you,” he repeated. “Apart from my sister, I’ve never said those words to another woman.”
“You don’t get points for that, Orion,” I told him. “Saying those words isn’t a get-out-of-jail-free card. Especially, when your actions say the very opposite.”
“I was wrong. I made a mistake,” he replied. “Are you so perfect that you can’t forgive someone that makes a mistake?”
“Is that what you’re looking for? My forgiveness?” I challenged. “Because I can send you a text when God gets me there. However, it’s the second chance that I will not be giving you.”
“Sinclair-”
“I will never date an athlete again,” I repeated, my voice stronger than I felt. “No matter if I forgive you or not, I will never date a professional athlete again. I don’t care who he is or how great he supposedly is.”
“Baby, don’t do this,” he begged. “I’ll get on my knees if you need me to.”
“God, you sound just like Cap,” I said, and when his face blanched, I took the opportunity to get in my car, then drive away andnotlook back.
Chapter 25
Orion~
Everyone was at my place, and I’d never felt so grateful. Titan’s season was just starting, so his coach had felt salty about him calling out for personal reasons, but it wasn’t like the Highland Wolves were going to kick him off the team. Tite was one of the best forwards in the league, if not the best. Titan’s off-field antics were only tolerated because he was the best at what he did. Granted, ever since that deal with Sebastian, he’d been behaving better, but the Wolves were very aware of what they had in Titan Miller.
“I wish I knew what to say,” Nova said, Sebastian’s arms wrapped around her as they sat together on the other end of the couch. “I went from hating her to feeling bad for her.”
“I can also call Esme and ask her how she got over the fucked-up shit that I did to her,” Raven offered. Esme couldn’t make the trip because she had to work, and though Raven hated going anywhere without her, he respected her independent need to work.
“I’ve got nothing,” Atlas admitted. “I mean, I have absolutely nothing.”
“No shit,” Titan agreed. “This isn’t an easy one.”
“Do you think she was serious about the restraining order?” Raven asked.
I nodded. “She’s not fucking around.”
“Is she worth getting tossed in jail for?” Sebastian asked. “Because I can’t see you letting this go if you really love her.”
“I do,” I told him. “I’m not confused about that.”
“If she’s not fucking around, then I don’t see what you can do about it,” Nova said sadly. “I mean, from a woman’s point of view, the more that you apologize, the more that you’re going to remind her of Cap Aldrich and that horrible time in her life.”
“She’s right,” Atlas remarked. “While you didn’t cheat on her, each time that you try to apologize, all it does is make her relive the betrayal.”
When Sinclair had driven off, leaving me standing alone in the parking lot of the Coltrane building, she’d left me believing every word out of her mouth. While some emotion had escaped at times, she’d sounded strong and sure as she told me that she’d never give me a second chance to break her heart again. Not once had she looked away, allowing some doubt to creep in.
I glanced around the room. “I’m going to retire after this season.”
You could hear a pin drop.
After a few seconds, Raven said, “That won’t guarantee that you get her back, O.”
“I know,” I sighed. “But if I don’t retire, then that guarantees that I’ll never get a chance to win her back. She was serious when she said that she would never date another athlete again.”
“Well, I mean…you could always un-retire, right?” Titan asked.
“How about you take a leave of absence for personal reasons, instead of actually retire?” Atlas suggested.
I shook my head. “Out of everything that she said the other night, she kept reiterating that she would never date another athlete again. It’s retire or let her go, and I can’t let her go.”
