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Helia gave me a narrow-eyed look, as if she felt my internal turmoil. “I’ve read it backwards and forwards—the first-born Princess of Oberwalden, presuming she is not the royal heir, will marry the Crown Prince of Tal. Trade rights in the addendum will be given when the marriage is legal. If either side breaks it, they will forfeit the other nation’s gifts while still uphold their side, unless either side is found unfitting.”
“I know the terms.” I sighed and settled in the chair opposite her. “And are you unfitting?”
I had almost been—if the marriage to Eki had been final, if our child had lived, Oberwalden could have claimed a breach. My father had ensured that possibility nevermanifested.
Helia raised her hand, counting off the conditions on her fingers. “I am the first-born princess but my older brother is the heir, and killing him to escape an unwanted marriage seems extreme; the seer confirmed my magic strong enough to fulfill your grandmother’s superstitions, and at least the healer was quick in checking there are no reasons I should be unable to bear an heir of my own”—from her disgusted frown, this was nothing she remotely desired—“and my education is considered adequate. Short of you marrying my aunt, I’ve found no solutions.”
“Flora von Heskin?” I almost choked on my own tongue. “Who you requested I lock in Tal’s prison?”
“She fulfills all of the requirements.”
“She can have children still?”Why was I even debating this?
Helia’s smile widened. “Perhaps not, but I never intended to participate in that part even if the marriage went through as planned, so really it wouldn’t change anything. You’re not my taste.”
“Not your taste?” I could hardly claim the same, considering how similar her looks were to Vanya’s, but the instant attraction, the push and pull, was nowhere between me and Helia.
She pointedly let her gaze travel from my boots to my no doubt scruffy chin. “A man.”
“Ah.” I processed it, rearranging what I knew of her. If she was not promised to be Queen of Tal, no one might have cared. With the marriage contract and the penalties attached, it made sense she had stayed out of the spotlight. “How long have you known?”
“That I like women?” Her face softened. “Always, or at least since I kissed Lorelei, a minor noble I grew up with, at eleven.”
“We don’t need to—” I waved a hand between us. “—even if we get married.By then, no one can force us to do anything.”
She nodded. “You’re a better man than I thought. If it gets that far, I planned to retire to a country estate for a season and return with another woman’s child—yours if you demand it. There are many who need a home. Why not make one of them the next ruler?”
For the first time, Helia seemed insecure, like she had not planned to tell me this. Some would call it treason. I did not care. Seeing one child burn had been enough, I had no desire for more. It only invited pain.
“You know I can’t marry your aunt. She most likely conspired against Tal. I might not care much for ruling, but I’ll not do more harm by giving someone like her power.”
Helia laughed, breaking the somber mood. “I never thought you’d consider it. Flora can rot where she is. She knew what I wanted and betrayed me.”
And she knew who was behind Tempest’s curse. Behind it all. So far, she was not talking though.
I studied Helia and remembered the kiss in the hospital. Remembered Alexei roaring his defiance at my side as the fire came closer. Despite knowing he had no magic, that none of his many skills meant anything against the flames, he had fought. When I returned to Tal, I only desired vengeance. For three years, the events of one night had twisted my insides, frozen the softness and care I believed led to the tragedy.
Tal needed stability—that meant a wedding and a ruler who did not run despite having no skills to fight the fires, like Alexei had. Undead walked and perhaps Solovyova’s beliefs held a kernel of truth. I needed to be free of my father, now more than ever, because inside me lived a new hope, feelings I knew I should cover with the familiar ice rather than let grow.
“What if we did notreallymarry?” I said.
Helia raised an eyebrow behind the thick glasses. “Of course. Why didn’t I think of that? Just breach a binding contract, contradict our Heads of House, defy the rules of magic—”
“After the ceremony and coronation. Then we defy the rules.”
She blinked at me, which I took as encouragement, speaking while my plan formed. It would never have worked without a bride as willing to lie as I.
“A marriage, in its simplest form, is a vow before the Goddess, a vow to each other,” I continued, voicing thoughts I once would have dismissed out of hand. “And in Tal you also vow to protect the city and the Spirits on behalf of the Goddess. Tradition states, we say them alone in the crypt. What if we wear the crowns but only say the second part of the vow—the one Solovyova insists on is needed to protect Tal—and leave the love and commitment to each other out? Who would know?”
Only two bells ago, I promised Mariska to protect Vanya. This was the same in reverse—one vow for Tal, one for love. Both precarious. Perhaps together, there was a sliver of a possibility to find the future I barely dared to dream of.
I could see Helia turning it around in her head. At least she did not reject it outright.
“They’ll still mark me as queen,” she said. “And we’ll still be tied together.”
I nodded. Me becoming king was necessary. I would not live under my father’s rule. “But we will be the Heads of House Herebov. You could govern Denyev or Kope, if you want, or retire to a country estate and live as you please, just not too far from Tal. When everything settles down,we’ll announce that this is a union but not a marriage sworn to the Goddess. You would be free to wed someone else if you wanted to.”
“The contract wouldn’t have been fulfilled.”
