AllFreeNovel
Share Us
“Yeah, I'll be okay.” Once I told him. Shit! How did I even start the conversation?
“What is that face?” Alex chuckled, moving to sit on the bed. “You look like you’re constipated.” I hit his arm playfully. “I might order some food. Did you want anything else?”
“Maybe one more pancake. Just with sugar and lemon, though.”
Alex frowned. “No chocolate sauce and cream? That’s unlike you.” Scratching the back on my neck, I shrugged.
The pancakes and juice that we’d ordered didn’t take long to arrive. Alex didn’t have a show tonight, but he was doing three shows in a row starting tomorrow.
I zoned out, staring at the last piece of pancake on my fork. Alex touched my face and turned my chin so I would look at him.
“You’ve been in a trance since yesterday. Baby, what the fuck is wrong?”
“I’m pregnant,” I blurted, dropping my fork. Well, that was an awful way to tell him!
“What?” His tone instantly changed. “That’s impossible! We were taking precautions. You’re on the fucking pill!” He moved off the bed and began to pace, as I knew he would. “We talked about this, Nat! You’re not ready for this! I’m not fucking ready for this! We are in the middle of a fucking tour, dammit! Not to mention your mental state!”
“Well, this baby is here now!” I snapped, annoyed that Alex was making this all about him. How dare he say that I wasn’t ready for this baby! I’d been ready for a baby for the last two years!
His cold eyes shot to me. “Did you fucking plan this? After everything we said at the cabin? You agreed to wait! Is that why you wanted me so much at the cabin? Why you were so insatiable? Did you somehow know we might catch? Fuck, Nat!”
I stopped breathing for a minute, my heart sinking. How could Alex think that of me!? That I’d deliberately deceive him! “You fucking asshole! You really think I’d do that? That I’d get pregnant on fucking purpose!?” I was up in an instant, storming for the door. I couldn’t even look at him right then! Alex grabbed my arm, the pain in his eyes easy to see. “Don’t fucking touch me!” I screamed, ripping free from his hold. “I had food poisoning, you motherfucker! The pill must have failed because I threw up so much! The cabin was only a few weeks ago! How the fuck would I know I’m pregnant in just a few weeks?”
“Nat, I’m sorry, I didn’t mean…”
“No! Fuck you, Alex! You don’t get to take it back! The words have already been said and broken me in two! After everything I’ve done for you…with how much I fucking love you! You decide to throw that shit in my face! Compare me to that bitch, Ness! You fucking compared me to all those women that wanted to trap you! You fucking, hurtful bastard!”
“Baby, please! I’m in shock!” Alex tried to reach for me, but I moved away, anger still flaring through my entire body!
“I’m fucking petrified! I have been since I found out yesterday. I have no idea if my body will fail us again! I know the timing is shit, trust me! I know you’re fucking pissed, but I needed you, Alex! I needed you to hold me and tell me everything was going to be okay! But what did you do instead? You fucking accused me of getting pregnant on purpose!”
“Of course I’m pissed, fuck! I’m stuck on a tour I can’t get out of! We still have six months left! How can I be there for you, Nat?! I’m tied to all this shit. Fuck, fuck, fuck! Everything is spiralling out of control!”
“And you don’t think I’m feeling the same way?” I yelled. I tried to open the door, but Alex slammed it with his hand.
“We need to talk about this, Nat. Running isn’t the answer! You always fucking run when the going gets tough. Am I not worth more than that?”
“Not right now, you’re not! Let me leave! I can’t stand the sight of you at the fucking moment!” I seethed, moving to try and open the door again. This time, Alex didn’t stop me.
“You’re really going to leave like this?” Alex’s eyes glazed over. “You're not even going to try and talk about it?”
“I’m fucking done! If we carry on with this conversation right now, both of us will say things we’ll regret! Maybe we already fucking have.” Alex dropped his hands to his side, allowing me to storm out of the hotel room.
“I’m not going to run after you this time, Nat. I mean it. This is your choice to act like a child and run! I thought we’d gotten past all this bullshit!” I couldn’t met his gaze; his voice was painful enough. “Please…!” He begged one last time. No, I wasn’t falling for that! I couldn’t. Stepping out of the door, I didn’t even look back at him. The bastard had hurt me deeply. He couldn’t expect to get away with that so easily.
I didn’t stop walking until Shane found me in reception. “Nat, what the fuck happened?”
“I need you to take me to my parents’ house,” I sobbed as Shane put his arms around me.
“Where’s Alex?”
“The asshole is still in our hotel room. Please, I need to get away from him for a while.” Shane didn’t ask any more questions, silently ushering me into a car.
After putting my phone on silent, I clutched my stomach. My heart was breaking for Little Bean. Didn’t Alex want this baby? Was the tour really more important to him than us?
How could he honestly think I’d planned this? The hatefulness in his tone…the way his eyes had been cold and dark…maybe I didn’t really know Alex at all.
What if this broke us? We’d spent the last two years begging for this life. The life where we could become parents.
