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And she had some guesses as to what they were.
Or at least one guess that sounded the most reasonable.
“Maybe it’s just that you’re having way less sex than usual,” she tried.
Because of course she knew that had to be the case. He was with her all the time. It wasn’t as if he could just nip out for the thousand one-night stands he probably usually had. Though somehow, it still felt shocking when he agreed.
When he more than agreed, in fact.
“Way less sex? Mabel, I’m not havinganysex. And haven’t for months,” he pretty much scoffed. As if it was outrageous that she’d imagined anything else. Even though she’d barely been able to believe in far less. Some part had thought maybe he was, somehow. But no, no. He wasn’t.
At all, apparently.
So no wonder he was a mess, really.
She was a mess just hearing about it.
It took her a full thirty seconds just to answer like a normal person.
“Well, there’s your problem then. You inexplicably not fucking anybody,” she said. With a little laugh on the end that she knew sounded false. Though thankfully, he didn’t make her feel it.
She just felt him shrug.
“It’s not inexplicable. I just, you know. Can’t at the moment.”
And then of course she had to ask.
No matter how much she didn’t want to.
“Why not, though?”
“Because reasons.”
“Yeah, and now tell me what the reasons are.”
She heard him take in a breath there. The way people did when they were about to say something. But the somethingdidn’t come right away. It seemed to take him a while to get out the words, and when he finally did he sounded strange.
Hollow, she thought. Or like he was having to force it all out.
“Well, it would look like I was cheating on you, wouldn’t it,” he explained.
And okay, yeah. She could understand then why it had taken some effort.
Because it was silly. Surely, he could see how silly it was. “But you could be really discreet. Slip away to some hotel, sneak her in the back. Then get her into your room, and slowly, slowly undress her. Maybe with your teeth, yeah, do it with your teeth, and then just as she—” she said, and honestly didn’t even think much about where she was going with this or what exactly it meant.
Until he cut her off, mid-sentence.
“What in the fucking fuck are youdoing?” he said.
At which point, she realized exactly what path she’d been going down.
And covered her face with her hands.
“Oh god, I don’t know. It just came out of me.”
“And yet you told me off for saying the worddick.”
“I’m not proud of myself, okay.”
