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Truthfully, she would have trusted Austin with her life.
“That day we were fighting the wildfire under dicey conditions. We were warned going in that the wind might shift, but they had predicted we had a solid twelve hours before that happened.”
She nodded, silently urging him to continue.
“We were making headway against the fire. Sam was working north of me when suddenly the wind shifted coming up from the south. He was farther away in the clear, but I wasn't. The fire headed straight toward me. I figured my time was up, I had made my peace with God and was ready to be called home to be with Jesus. But then Sam appeared out of nowhere, telling me to run for the river. Even after we reached the water, Sam didn't quit. He kept on working, lighting a backfire to divert the path of the wildfire. When he finally finished, we both jumped into the water. I was face down, but I don’t think Sam was, or he didn’t stay that way as long as he should have. The fire didn't get us, but he must have taken in a lot more smoke than I did because suddenly his breathing was bad. Very bad.”
She couldn't speak, the picture he painted was far too real. Good heavens, she'd never realized how close Austin had come to dying that day, too.
“He'd inhaled too much smoke, but there was nowhere for us to go. I called the medevac chopper, and they did come for us, but it was too late.” Austin's gaze was tortured. “Sam could have saved himself, Lindsey, but he didn't. He came back for me. And he died for his efforts.”
She didn't know what to say. After all these months, she had honestly believed Sam had been careless. Had purposefully put his life on the line because she'd filed for divorce and had asked him to leave.
She'd built him up in her mind as being the bad guy. Especially after she discovered the mountain of debt he'd left behind. And she'd been angry at the way he'd tossed his life away, as if she and Josh hadn't been worth the effort.
Now Austin had just told her that in those final moments of his life Sam hadn't been careless after all.
He'd been a hero.
Chapter Thirteen
Lindsey stared at him for a long moment, unsure of what to say. Truthfully, she was glad to hear that in the end Sam had come through when it had counted. That her husband had cared enough about Austin to help save his life.
“Can you forgive me, Lindsey?” Austin’s tone held a note of anxiety. “I know I should have told you sooner, but I didn't want you to hate me.”
“Of course, I don't hate you. And there’s nothing to forgive. You and Sam were doing your best in a difficult and dangerous situation.” She pressed her lips together in a self-depreciating frown. “How strange we've both been feeling guilty over the same thing. Each blaming ourselves for Sam's death.”
“His last thoughts were of you,” Austin said slowly. “He was worried about both you and Josh.”
What was left of her anger evaporated. Sam may not have been the best husband, but he had cared. She nodded. “Thank you for telling me.”
The expectant look he gave her made her realize she'd never answered his question about marrying him. And as much as she really wanted to, she just couldn't. Not yet. Everything was too confusing.
“I don't know if I can marry you, Austin,” she finally admitted. “My heart wants to say yes, but my head is telling me I need time.”
His smile was crooked. “I think you should listen to your heart.”
She let out a chuckle. “I'll think about it, okay? I promise I'll consider your proposal.”
Expecting an argument, she was somewhat surprised when he nodded. “That's all I'm asking, Lindsey. You can take all the time you need.”
“Thank you.” She turned and made her way toward the connecting door.
Austin moved quickly, catching her hand to stop her. “Lindsey?”
“Yes?”
He pulled her back into his arms for a thorough kiss. Her head was spinning by the time he let her go. “Think about that while you're considering my proposal,” he murmured. “I'll see you in the morning.”
“Okay.” It wasn’t easy to shake off the effect of his kiss, but she forced herself to go before she made another rash decision. She slipped through the connecting door to her room she shared with Josh.
He was still sleeping, thankfully. She eased into her own bed and stared up at the ceiling, mulling over Austin's marriage proposal.
Somehow it was difficult to remember the reasons she'd resisted saying yes.
The next morning, Josh was up early. Of course, he'd gotten a full night's sleep, unlike her.
Stifling a wide yawn, she padded to the tiny coffee maker filled it with water and stared as the carafe slowly filled with freshly brewed coffee.
