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‘What the hell was in those brownies?’ I say, wrapping myself up in the duvet.
Gavin sticks his head out the door of our ensuite bathroom and pulls the toothbrush out of his mouth. ‘I dunno,’ he says, ‘but they were delicious.’
‘They were loaded with sugar,’ I say. ‘That’s why Molly was so hyper. I thought we were never going to get her to sleep.’
I hear Gavin spit into the sink and the tap runs. He swings the door open wide and the sudden burst of light from the bathroom shines in my face and makes me squint.
‘She’s just excited about seeing Kayla soon,’ Gavin says, closing the bathroom door and turning off the light, plunging us into darkness.
‘Huh. Sorry, what?’ I say, sitting up dramatically despite the darkness.
‘At the hospital,’ Gavin says, and I feel him roll into bed beside me. ‘You know Kayla’s surgery is coming up.’
‘Yeah of course,’ I say, trying not to let Gavin hear the worry in my voice.
‘Well, Heather thinks it would really cheer Kayla up to see Molly. With Kayla starting chemo straight away, there’s no way of knowing what that will do to her immune system. This really is the best time.’
‘When were you going to talk to me about this?’ I ask.
‘Charlie, we have talked about this.’ Gavin sighs, and I can hear the exhaustion in his tone. ‘It’s surgery first, then chemo.’
‘I mean about Molly visiting the hospital.’ I inhale. It’s so hard not to let my emotion spill.
‘Oh,’ Gavin says. ‘Well, we’re talking about this now, aren’t we?’
‘No.’ I exhale, and it hangs in the air heavier than I mean it to. ‘This is you making a plan with Heather and filling me in after all the decisions are made. You’ve talked to Heather about this. Not me. Heather.’
‘Charlie, I’m sorry,’ Gavin says, and I can’t tell from his voice if he’s frustrated or upset. The darkness isn’t helping. The bed bounces and I know Gavin has turned his back on me. ‘I’ve so much on my mind, I guess I just forgot to mention it before now. But you knew we’d be bringing Molly to see Kayla at some point, obviously.’
‘Gavin,’ I say, throwing my legs over the side of the bed to stand up.
‘Mmm,’ he says, sleepily.
I walk across the room with my arms held out in front of me like a zombie as I feel around for the light switch. I flick it on.
‘Gavin,’ I repeat, louder this time. ‘Seriously. This isn’t okay. I get that you’re in hell right now. But Molly is our child. Ours. You don’t get to make these decisions without me. Can we talk about this please?’
‘Charlie, we just did.’ Gavin turns around, squinting as the light blinds him.
‘And?’
‘And what?’ Gavin rubs his eyes.
I glare at my husband, so hurt and infuriated.
‘Kayla’s surgery is soon, and Heather and I thought it would be good to get the girls together once Kayla is feeling up to it. Maybe over the weekend,’ Gavin says. ‘Is that okay with you?’
‘Heather and you thought.’ I slam my hands onto my hips. ‘Heather. And. You. Thought. Oh, well, that’s just bloody fine then, isn’t it? Because if Heather thinks, then, what the hell does it matter what Charlotte thinks?’
‘Charlie, what’s wrong?’ Gavin says, sitting up. ‘You know Molly has been asking questions about Kayla.’
‘What’s wrong?’ I say. ‘What’s wrong?’
Gavin shakes his head and looks at me confused. It only upsets me more, a hard lump rising in my throat.
‘I want you to talk to me, Gavin. That’s what’s wrong. Talk to me. Please. Me!’ I tap my chest. ‘I’m your wife. Not Heather.’
‘Charlie…’ Gavin begins but he trails off without saying anything.
