Page 82 of You Had Me at Merlot

Leighton decided to take the reins. “I miss you, and I’m worried about you. There.”

There was a hint of a soften behind Jamie’s eyes. “I miss you, too. But I promise, nothing to worry about. I just needed some time for me. To get a handle on all the new changes.”

Leighton searched for meaning, absently clicking a pen she found on the counter. “What changes? The new bar?”

“Sure. I bet that stress is part of it.”

She stared Jamie in the face and saw right through the white lie. “Jamie.” With hands on the back of her hips, Jamie looked at her fully, the first time since she’d arrived. The look on her face spoke volumes and everything in Leighton trembled. With that look, she knew. “This is about the engagement. This is about me.”

For a long stretch of time, Jamie didn’t say anything, and Leighton waited, afraid to move. Finally, Jamie nodded, tears touching her eyes.The world tilted. Disorientation descended, while Leighton gave her head a shake. This wasn’t fair. Leighton was happy. For the first time in a long while, she had something to look forward to, and for Jamie to step in now, for Jamie to—

“I’m in love with you.”

“No.”

A beat. “No?” Jamie’s brows drew in, and she wiped away a stray tear. “I think only I get to decide.”

“No, as in it’s not okay for you to do this now. There’s Helen. Absolutely not.” Of all the things she expected she might hear from Jamie today, this was not one of them. She needed to unhear the words. Go back in time two minutes.

Jamie held up a hand. “I know. I get that. And I’m not trying to ruin anything.” Jamie came around the island in the kitchen that had been a barrier between them. “I didn’t come knocking on your door. You came knocking on mine.”

“Then why?”

“Because it’s the truth?”

Leighton threw a questioning arm out. “Why is itnowthe truth? Why wasn’t it the truth six weeks ago, six months ago, any other time?”

“Maybe it was. That’s what I’m working through, but a lot happened between us over the years, and sometimes one emotion topples another until it doesn’t anymore. I was scared, Leighton, so incredibly terrified of you, of how you made me feel, of what you were capable of taking away from me.” She touched her forehead. “And you’re so far out of my league that it’s laughable.”

“Don’t you ever say that.” Leighton took a commanding, angry step forward. “Don’t you ever—” But she didn’t finish that sentence. Instead she stepped forward and kissed Jamie with all the intense emotion this conversation had inspired. She kissed her because she didn’t know how not to, knowing what she knew now. She kissed her because Jamie needed to know how amazing Leighton thought she was, even if also a little infuriating. She kissed her because, even in sweats, she was the most beautiful, sexy woman Leighton had ever seen. And most of all, she kissed Jamie because she loved her back. And none of it was fair. As her lips moved over Jamie’s, she sank into the most wonderful familiarity. She’d missed this feeling, this exhilaration and wonder, and couldn’t get enough of it in this moment. Her memory hadeven undersold how well they fit together, and just for a few lingering moments, she let herself feel like she was home.

But that was all she was allowed.

She pulled her lips away and gave her head a shake. “Shouldn’t have done that.”

“I know.” Jamie nodded. “It’s okay.”

“It’s not. Nothing about any of this is okay.” She’d been meeting with a wedding planner that very day. Her fiancée was out for drinks with friends. She couldn’t allow herself to reach for what her heart was already reaching for. “I’m awful for this.”

“This was my fault. I should never have said those words.”

Leighton shrugged. “But you did.” She looked behind her, confused and not sure what to do with herself. She had to get away, though. That much was clear. “I’m just gonna…yeah.” She turned and walked straight out the door. Not a good-bye. Not even a look back. She needed air, clarity, and some time alone. What was she supposed to do now with this new information, which, quite frankly, shattered her, given the situation. She spent the next two hours walking in the rain, intermittent showers that would ease until they started again. She wasn’t sure where she was going, but the movement and the raindrops stripped her bare and helped loosen up her thoughts. Her head ached just as much as her heart did.

She was mad at the world, she was incredulous, and she knew now, with sore feet and wrung dry emotions, that she needed to talk to Helen.

“Why are you wet?” Helen asked when Leighton opened the door to her apartment. “Did you walk in this rain?”

Leighton nodded. “I wasn’t sure you’d be back from drinks yet. I’m glad you are.”

Helen regarded her for another curious beat. “Audrey started flirting with some guy, and I know we used to scope out guys together, but I just can’t anymore. I watched for as long as I could, but I wanted to get back here and go over some of the plans from today.”

“I need to talk to you about something important.”

Helen looked up from her laptop. “Yeah. I’m listening.” Except she’d gone right back to the screen.

Leighton sat down on the couch nearby and waited. Noticing, Helen sighed and set the laptop aside. “You have my full attention.”

“When I was at Jamie’s apartment earlier, something happened.”

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