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The mind can be the sharpest weapon one possesses, but it can also be the blade that delivers the fatal blow.
Asidian proverb
It was quiet for a long time after Nic sliced open his own throat.
The winds were changing, taking the cursed poison with them—whatever it was that had caused such chaos to ensue. A poison that had compelled a young boy to kill himself in the most gruesome of ways.
Jake was the first to react, rushing to cradle his dead friend in his lap. Tears cascaded down his golden cheeks, sobs racking his lithe frame as he wailed. As he mourned for his friend.
I stopped breathing, my limbs weighted down by the realization of what I’d just witnessed. WhatIhad failed to stop. Again.
Kiara moved quickly as she reached for her discarded glove, sliding it on while the others were distracted. Her entire body trembled, and I wanted to reach out, to hold her in my arms.
But her scars…
I’d finally seen what she concealed, and… There were no words. I had never seen anything like them before, and gods knew I had seen every manner of injury over the years. They’d beenblack, veiny, tinges of blue whispering among the glimmering onyx. My throat constricted as I peeled my eyes from her.
Kiara had hidden herself from me out of fear of my reaction, but while shocked by the revelation, I didn’t feel repulsed, only curious.
Jake continued to rock Nic in his arms, his tears splattering upon his friend’s open wound. Kiara rushed away from the group, leaning over to heave up the meager contents of her stomach.
I was beside her in a heartbeat, winding my fingers through her hair and holding the strands away from her face, mustering whatever soothing words I could find and whispering them in her ear. I couldn’t help it, and thoughts of maintaining my distance vanished entirely. Someone had killed themselves before our very eyes, and pushing her away would just be cruel.
The moment she’d gotten everything out of her system, she took off, marching to where Starlight and the other horses rested. She grabbed at her canteen, unscrewing the cap and chugging the cool water.
Starlight protested beside her, waving her head back and forth as she kicked out her front legs.
“Shhh, girl. It’s all right,” she whispered, leaning her head against the mare’s neck.
She settled at Kiara’s touch, allowing Kiara to hold her as a lone tear escaped down her cheek, dripping onto Starlight’s velvety coat.
“Kiara.”
She jerked at the sound of her name.
I spoke it again, and her body tensed when I wound my arms around her, holding onto her waist as my chest pressed into her back. “This was why I didn’t want you to come.”
No one should bear witness to this.
I rubbed soft circles onto her back, resting my chin atop her hair. She let out a soft whimpering sound before giving in to the sensation of being held.
I could tell it was new to her as well, the touching. Given how she barely touched the others—unless it was a playful jab or a punch to the face during training—she hadn’t displayed intimacy with anyone else. Not like she did with me.
It made me relax, knowing that we both were unaccustomed to this, to embracing.
I only wished to ease her fears, to silently let her know that I’d seen her secret and that it didn’t bother me. She, of all people, should have known that.
After many minutes passed, I angled my head, pressing my cheek against her red hair. “This is what it does. The curse. But I can’t understand how you weren’t affected. All I know is that you seemed to stop it from getting worse. Before all of us killed one another. You saved us.”
She winced at my words, but I merely tightened my grip around her waist.
“You killed your brothers,” she said softly.
My breath hitched. I’d almost entirely forgotten I’d confessed my dark truth. “And I regret what I’ve done every single day. Every moment of my existence.”
“It wasn’tyou, though. Even Patrick wanted to kill Jake. He almost did.” Twisting in my arms, she slanted her chin to meet me head on, her features turning hard. I despised the inches between us. “You say you wished I’d never come here, but if what you believe is true, that I somehow broke the Mist’s hold, then I’m right where I should be.”
Raising her chin, she sniffed back the tears aching to be released. I noted her fists clenched at her sides, the leather of her gloves straining. I wouldn’t speak of that, not now and not with the others. They might not have noticed in all the chaos, and I refused to push her.
