AllFreeNovel
Share Us
It was one of the sweetest sentiments I’d ever heard. He said it with such conviction that my heart lurched and sped up. “It’s too risky.” I was too much of a risk. I understood him wanting to be part of Abigail’s life—especially if he was her father. “You could lose everything.”
His head shook side to side slowly, and he never broke eye contact with me. “No. Losing you would be losing everything.You, Abigail, and what we have are the only irreplaceable things in my life.”
“And Lennox and Justin?” I breathed out their names, tasting the sultry heat of pleasure on my tongue.
His grin widened. “They’re part of what I have with you.”
I wanted that too. I wanted it so much my whole body reacted with a violent shudder. No one had ever made me feel the way they did. But what about my work? How could I advocate for women while tangled up in a relationship with three men? Maybe that was another way to stick it to society, but I didn’t see any of them allowing me to advocate for women and girls in sports while in such a compromising relationship. Would I even have time for my advocacy work while in a relationship? I’d already sacrificed time that I should have spent on my work and spent it with Zachary. The gala was a good blend of both worlds, but those opportunities were few and far between. Agreeing to a relationship meant the advocacy would suffer further neglect.
“I can’t.” I forced my head to move side to side despite the screaming in the back of my mind. “I can’t have everything I want. It’s too much. Between work and Abigail and my advocacy, I don’t have time for a relationship.”
Zachary didn’t move except to breathe. He watched me for several seconds, his quiet contemplation sending heat rushing through me. “You can have it all. You deserve to have everything you want.”
I shook my head, trying to rid myself of the tantalizing words. “You don’t understand the toll this will take on all of us. You, Lennox, and Justin are risking too much to be with me. I won’t let you do that.”
A muscle feathered in his jaw, his first real sign of annoyance. “You don’t get to be the one who makes that call. We all know what we’re risking. And we can decide for ourselves if we want totake the chance. I do. I feel pretty confident speaking for Lennox and Justin too, but you can ask them yourself.”
My breaths came hard and fast. He meant every word. He was choosing me. Not just because he thought he was Abigail’s father. He was choosing me because he wanted me. He thought that they all wanted me enough to risk their careers. It was too much. I raised a hand to my throat and rubbed my palm over my thundering pulse.
“We can figure it out.” He held out his hands but didn’t touch me. He seemed to know that I needed space. “Don’t let fear keep you from us. Please.”
Good God. The way he saidpleaserippled through me, begging me to take a minute and listen not just to my fear but to my hopes and dreams. I’d given up on a relationship a long time ago. That didn’t mean I’d stopped dreaming of a happily ever after that included a husband. A husband, I reminded myself savagely. One. Singular. Not three men. Not plural. What a mess. Why did I have to like all three? Why couldn’t I be satisfied with a normal relationship?
Fucking hell. I was so tired of trying to justify what I wanted by society’s yardstick. “I’ll think about it.” It was the best I could do under the circumstances.
“Come to my house tonight and think about it?” He gave me a boyish grin and wiggled his eyebrows. “I’ll even bring Lennox and Justin over. We can all think about it together.”
“I can’t.” I reached over and gripped his arm to stop the hurt cutting into his smile. “I have Abigail to think about. It’s a school night, and I don’t want her schedule thrown off by a strange house.”
“Right.” His smile looked forced, but he held my gaze. “What time should I meet you at the clinic?”
“Five.” I checked my watch. “That gives us plenty of time to get the test done and have dinner.” I filled my lungs with air andheld it. Need drove me more than I cared to admit. I didn’t want to go to bed alone tonight. I knew the pleasure I’d be missing, and my body cried out for it.
Zachary started to turn away.
“Why don’t you all come to my house tonight once Abigail is asleep?” the words rushed out in a single breath. “I’d like to spend time with you. With all of you.”
Maybe I was making a big mistake, but I had to have another night with them. I deserved happiness too. I told myself this over and over as Zachary smiled and nodded.
“What time?” He gripped the doorknob in one meaty fist. “I’ll tell Lennox and Justin.”
25
LENNOX
Iwasn’t sure what to expect when I pulled up in Lucy’s driveway, but the cute little bungalow with yellow shutters and front door had me grinning from ear to ear, especially when Lucy opened that front door wearing a sunshine yellow sweater over black leggings. Her hair fell down loose over her shoulders, and I clenched my hands into fists to keep from driving them straight into the soft strands.
She messed with me in a way I’d never experienced before. I wasn’t the kind of guy who hopped from woman to woman like Justin, but something about Lucy tugged on pieces of me that I’d never given to anyone. She made me want to let out the animal side of myself, the part I kept hidden under a calm exterior. Lucy Ashley drove me wild. And she didn’t have a fucking clue.
“Hi.” She propped the door open with her hip and motioned me inside.
I took my time walking past her, pausing a breath away to inhale her lilac scent. “I’m glad you invited us over.”
Discomfort flashed over her face, there and gone so fast I almost missed it. What was that all about? I knew better than to ask her directly. Better to come at it from around the corner.
“How did the paternity test go?” Zachary had filled us in on the plan earlier. I shed my coat and hung it on a peg beside Lucy’s and a pink puffy thing that must be Abigail’s.
Lucy closed the door a little harder than necessary. “Abigail thought it was great. She asked the nurse a million questions.” Her face tightened as she frowned. “I need to send her a thank you card or something. She deflected Abby’s questions better than I ever could. She still has no idea why we were there.”
