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Goose chuckles at my bullshit, flips me off, and speeds away.
“Is she really just ditching us?” Coco asks.
“Yeah, but we’re only forty-five minutes out. Let her go ahead and clean up the Pigsty for our arrival. Actually, I think I’ll go ahead and text her those instructions, so she’ll know what her benevolent dictator expects upon his arrival.”
Coco flashes an uncertain gaze at Austen. “Are you okay?”
“No.”
“Should I drive the rest of the way?”
“Yes.”
“I think Austen should ride with me,” I announce, trying out my dictator skills with the women.
Austen stares at me in horror. I wave at my new motorcycle and then grab the helmet.
“It’s too small to fit my head anyway,” I say and hand it to her. “Those Banta City bikers must have tiny heads if they thought this thing would fit me. I bet it’ll slide on real nice over your red hair.”
“I don’t think I can.”
“You used to ride horses. This is way easier. I’ll do all the driving. You just have to hold on and avoid grabbing my dick.”
“Can you manage that?” Coco teases Austen who is halfway between giggling and sobbing.
“I’ll fall off.”
“No, you won’t,” I promise despite how one of my ex-girlfriends did go flying off my hog before. “Just don’t forget to hold on.”
Austen wants to tell me no. She looks to Coco for help as I shepherd her toward the motorcycle. No one will save her from what she doesn’t want, and she doesn’t have the courage to put her foot down. Last night, when she thought we were under threat, she flipped out and spoke up, even if only to call in backup from her mom.
Today, she must not really be as afraid as she seems. Or I’m misreading everything. Yeah, it’s probably the last part.
Sliding the shiny black helmet over her head, I explain, “I want to ride triumphantly back into town, having defeated our enemy and won the heart of a sexy babe. Is that so wrong?”
Austen’s expression is hidden behind the visor. She doesn’t think to lift it. I climb on the motorcycle and reach for her arm.
“Just throw your leg over like you would a horse.”
“I haven’t ridden in more than a decade.”
“With how much you loved riding, I know you haven’t forgotten how.”
Austen wants me to back down and let her go with Coco, but she won’t say the words. I might be fucking up right now by pushing her too hard and expecting too much.
However, Austen does climb on behind me. I hear her mumbling about how she’s too big to fit. I don’t waste time explaining how she’s wrong. Austen won’t listen to me. She’s got this nagging bitch in her head, telling her ugly shit.
The only way she’ll accept I’m right and the bitch is wrong is for us to ride to the Pigsty. She’ll fit just fine and won’t fall. Facts rather than promises will fix her crazy.
Austen Halvorson is a gorgeous, smart woman, but she’s most definitely a little fucking crazy. She thinks her curvy ass is ginormous. She thinks she’s clumsy despite her never doing anything remotely uncoordinated. The woman can’t see herself clearly.
With Coco driving the SUV, I guide us past a dozen exits including one for Canary Basin. I feel Austen’s arms tighten around me in reaction to our proximity to her father’s place. She eases up once the exit is behind us.
Finally, we arrive at McMurdo Valley’s first exit. I lift my face and smile against the sun. The land where I was born, bled, and reborn welcomes me home.
AUSTEN
I woke up today raw with anxiety. Everything around me feels jagged, leaving behind painful marks on my already fried mind. I can’t get hold of my feelings. The only time the noise quiets inside me is at the gas station. Walla Walla’s words break through my panic.
