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“Where are you going?” Crew demanded, lifting a brow. The sharp tang of citrus wafting off him brought back memories of the orange trees my mom had kept in our backyard.
“To bed, if you’d move,” I mumbled, ducking my head so he wouldn’t see the obvious fear shining through.
“Something’s wrong.” It was a statement of fact, and Crew’s brow furrowed as he tried to figure out what I wasn’t saying.
I curled my shoulders in, trying to make myself less visible. These guys read me way too easily. “I’m just tired.”
Kellan made a clicking sound with his tongue. “Sugar, please don’t lie.”
“I’m not,” I argued, setting my mouth in a tight line as I twisted my head to see him.
Crew’s cheek pressed against mine. “We can smell you, little one. Under all that sweet arousal is a sour note that’s about to make three alphas lose their shit to fix whatever’s broken.”
“And a beta,” Jude chimed in. “What gives, pretty girl?”
I closed my eyes and inhaled deeply, their combined scents feeling dangerously like home. “I’m what’s broken,” I whispered.
“Huh?” Kellan’s voice was closer now. He’d gotten up and was standing next to Crew.
“I don’t want to go to bed,” I confessed. “I don’t want to lay up there by myself and think about all the horrible shit that’s happened. I don’t want to wonder where Logan is; if he’s safe or freaking out. If I go up there, all I’ll do is relive the last four years. It’ll ruin the nest and the memories of what we did.”
I opened my eyes to see Crew and Kellan staring at me. When I turned my head, Jude looked heartsick and Rhett was swallowing roughly.
I blew out a breath, fighting the tears clogging my throat. “Yes, I know I probably need a bazillion hours of therapy to work through the last four years, but I also know that my anxiety is the worst at night and?—”
Kellan ripped me away from Crew with a hiss, hauling me against his chest as he started to purr violently.
Who knew purring could be violent? But Kellan seemed closer to feral than not. And his hands, while infinitely gentle as he held me, trembled.
“Hazel, baby, you sleeping alone was never an option,” Crew rasped, sounding gutted. He moved to touch me, but Kellan spun us away with a growl, even going as far as baring his teeth at the others.
Crew’s eyes narrowed. “Watch yourself, Kellan.”
“Both of you calm down.” Rhett’s voice was even and controlled as he stepped between the alphas, but concern lined his face. “Don’t scare her.”
“I’m not scared,” I said, tipping my head back to see Kellan, “because Kellan would never hurt me. Would you, big guy?”
Kellan blinked once. Twice. Then his dark eyes fastened to mine. The purring didn’t stop, and I melted against him a little more. I threaded my arms around his neck, and his hands lifted me so I could wrap my legs around his waist.
Everyone seemed to hold their breath, waiting to see if Kellan had dipped too far into feral alpha territory.
I remembered old news clips of alphas who’d gone feral. And one of the Shepherds had gone feral at the compound. It usually ended badly for everyone involved. I didn’t remember how the news story had ended, but the image of my feet splattered with blood after Donovan shot the feral alpha in the head still hadn’t left me.
My stomach rolled as fear for Kellan gripped me. Kellan would never hurt me—I knew it in my bones. But I also knew that this man felt deeply. If he came out of an alpha haze thinking he’d scared me, it would destroy him.
Crew sucked in a deep lungful of air and seemed to force himself to take a step back. “We never meant you’d be alone, Hazel. Unless you explicitly state otherwise, you can pretty much expect at least one of us in your bed at all times.”
“Or all of us,” Rhett added.
“Or you can come to our rooms,” Jude chimed in.
Crew cleared his throat. “But you also have your own space, if and when you need it.”
I framed Kellan’s face with my hands, my attention solely on him. “That sounds perfect. And Crew’s right, I’m pretty freaking tired. A shower and bed sounds ideal. Can we do that, Kellan?”
He gave a slow, considerate nod but his eyes never wavered as he watched me.
Several chimes went off from all their phones, and I flinched at the sudden noise. Kellan’s hands tightened around me, flattening my chest to his.
