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“I might have mentioned to him that I was interested in you, by the way,” she admits sheepishly. “He doesn’t know how long I’ve known you or how we really met, but he told me all good things.”
I can’t hold back the smile that overtakes my face because she talked to him about me at all. A part of me was still worried that she’d want to hide this.
“I don’t deserve it. He’s been a good friend to me and I hate keeping the truth from him. I am going to tell him everything eventually. I owe him that. I’ve never lied to him before and I don’t want this to be a secret.”
“Okay,” she agrees with a smile.
That one simple response confirms what I needed. She doesn’t care that we’ll have to tell her brother the truth. We’re both jumping in head-first now. She’s going to give this a chance.
However, I have to ask the question that’s been eating at me. “Does he know about…?” I can’t bring myself to finish the sentence out loud, but there is no need.
“No. I never told anyone, besides my therapist and Liv. Latisha knows foggy details because of working so closely with me these last two years, but I’ve never even told my mom.” She shrugs as if she hasn’t been carrying the heaviest weight in the world on her shoulders with hardly any support.
“Everyone thinks that I’m not interested in dating. Or maybe they think I’m gay, I don’t know. I’ve never had any issues around my brother, I guess my brain always knew he was safe. So, they have no clue.”
“Touching my hair was okay?” I wasn’t expecting any type of touch from her anytime soon so I was shocked. I was more than willing to let her take all the time she needed.
The act itself seems innocent, but the connection was more than that. I felt closer to her at that moment than I’ve ever felt with anyone. I haven’t been able to relax in weeks but it coaxed me right to sleep. I didn’t mean for that to happen, but it was the most restful sleep that I’ve had in a long time.
“Yeah. I’ve never really had the chance to explore my boundaries. There’s never been anyone that I’ve felt comfortable enough with to try,” she explains, her fingers playing with her bottom lip, while I watch with envy.
“Anything you want, baby. I’m your guinea pig.” I wink, making her giggle shyly. It’s late, but I don’t want to leave. I could sit here talking to her all night.
“Thank you for being so understanding and not pressuring me. It means a lot to me that you haven’t judged me,” she explains, looking at me sweetly.
“You deserve to feel safe and I would never judge you for that.”
“I know, but I’ve not always had that experience. You’re more thoughtful than all the other men I’ve encountered combined.” She laughs, but I don’t. I don’t like what she’s insinuating.
“Do you want to talk about it?” I’m already imagining the ways I want to eliminate every guy who’s ever wronged her.
“No… No.” She shakes her head, but I see her wheels turning, then she sighs. “One guy asked me out once. It was a few years back, Liv and I were at dinner. I told him that I wasn’t interested. He thought forcing his way onto our table and draping himself over my chair was going to change my mind.
“I ended up flipping the table in my haste to get away from him. Liv almost got the cops called because she was screaming at him in the middle of the restaurant.” She covers her face again, shaking her head but laughing. “It was a mess.”
“I’m sorry that happened,” I tell her truthfully. She doesn’t deserve to be harassed like that. No one does. I can’t stand bastards like that.
“Me too.” She shrugs. Her clear dismissal worries me because I suspect it’s one of the less traumatic moments of her past and that grates at my insides.
“Liv sounds like a good friend.” I’m glad she had at least one person in her corner all these years.
“She’s the best. She’s a lawyer. Very argumentative.” She laughs at her own joke, making me smile until a knock at the door startles us both.
“I’m not expecting anyone,” she whispers, her eyes round with worry. I make my way to the door and look out the peephole.
For fuck’s sake.
“It’s Kyle. Go upstairs, stay in your room until I come to get you,” I instruct, waiting for her to get up and move past me.
She halts midway up the stairs. “I should probably warn you. He’s still not happy with me. He sent me a text calling me a bitch so, I blocked his number.”
“You’re only telling me this now?” I’m whispering, but my tone is exasperated. As if I haven’t been showing her this whole time that her safety is important to me. She somehow still doesn’t believe me.
“Sorry, I forgot. My mind’s been preoccupied.” She gestures between us.
“One of these days I’m going to spank your ass.” I meant it as a mild threat, but the look on her face is nothing short of intrigued. Jesus Christ. “Go. Lock your door.”
This woman is going to kill me.
