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“When’s the next one?”
“My twenty-eight-week one.”
“Shit, Aoife, I can’t believe you’re already halfway there.”
“Yeah.” I sighed heavily. “Me either.”
“Listen.” Twisting sideways to face me, my best friend took my hand in hers and squeezed. “I know you don’t want to talk about Joe, but I just need to make sure you know that none of his behavior has a thing to do with his feelings for you and the baby.” She gave me a sad smile. “He’s messed up in the head, babe. He’s dealing with a lot of unresolved trauma. I mean, the shit with his father is enough to give me PTSD, let alone Joey. But none of that means that he doesn’t love you and baby bear.”
“I know he loves us,” I whispered, my gaze flicking to my lap as a tear threatened to spill. “But he just loves that poison he injects in his veins more.”
“We both know that’s not true.” She was quick to soothe. “But we also both know that he’s not getting better without professional help. It’s gone too far, Aoife, and lying and covering for him isn’t going to help him in the long run.”
“What am I supposed to do, Case?” I choked out, swinging my attention back to her. “I can’t force him into a rehab program, and even if I could, how am I supposed to pay for it? His mother doesn’t give a damn, and every penny I’m earning at the pub, I’m either using to pay off his debts or trying to save up for the baby. Because that’s another thing I have to worry about. What if he’s not there when the time comes?”
“Don’t think like that,” she argued, flinching. “He’ll be there, Aoife.”
“But if he’s not?” I pushed, forcing myself to admit my greatest fear aloud. “What if he slips so far off the map that I can’t reach him? What if he overdoses? If he dies? Or gets killed? What then, Case?” The tears I’d been trying to fight escaped me and I sniffled back a sob. “What am I supposed to do? Mam and Dad can’t finance this baby. They’re barely making ends meet as it stands. I know what Joey needs, but I just…” Feeling helpless, I shrugged. “I just don’t have the money to fix him.”
“Doesn’t his older brother have a good job?”
“Fuck Darren,” I spat out, narrowing my eyes. “He would rather pay me to have an abortion than pay to fix his brother’s mental health. Besides, he’s been spending more and more time in Belfast lately. Mark my words, Case, he’ll be gone before the baby’s born.”
“You could ask him to help you.”
“I did.”
“Ask him again.”
“Please don’t start,” I warned, holding a hand up. “I already have Mam on my back twenty-four seven, lecturing me on everything that I should be doing. Please, Case, I don’t need it from you, too.”
“Never,” she soothed, slinging an arm over my shoulder. “In my humble opinion, I think you’re a bomb-ass bitch for handling all of this so well.”
“Funny.”
“It’s true,” she pushed. “You are incredible, Aoife. The definition of a strong woman. All the crap you’ve been taking from assholes at school? How you handle yourself? How you get up and hold your head high each morning? Babe, you are amazing.”
“Except that I’ve never felt less like a woman, Case,” I admitted hoarsely. “And more like a lost child.”
Distracted when the sound of a car engine revving filled my ears, we both turned to see a fancy Lexus pull up at the footpath in front of Katie’s house next door.
“Well, if it isn’t Miss Slick, riding shotgun with the rich boys,” Alec called out from the green, whistling loudly. “Fuck me, Podge, we’re in the wrong damn school. The best I’ve ever been dropped home from school in was the back seat of Aoife’s banger.”
“Hey, you leave Rattles and Squeaks alone, ya hear,” Casey called back with a laugh. “It beats the hell out of the shitty saddle you gave me on the back of your mountain bike.”
“Stolen mountain bike,” Podge chimed in as both boys crossed the road to meet us.
“Don’t pretend like I didn’t give you the ride of your life,” Al teased, winking at my bestie.
“Did you?” Casey pretended to think hard about it. “Must not have been that memorable if I can’t recall.”
“Cheeky fucker.” He chuckled, tossing his sweat-soaked T-shirt on his lap. “When you’re ready for the sequel just say the word, Devil Tits.”
My laughter quickly died in my throat when the passenger seat of the Lexus flew open and a teary-eyed Katie emerged, followed by a boy I knew wasn’t her boyfriend. “Katie?”
“Patrick?” Casey called out, sounding confused as we both scrambled to our feet.
“Okay,” I growled as I moved straight for my friend, with my bestie and my boyfriend’s besties flanking me. “Who the hell hurt you and where do we find them?”
