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If I was a stronger man, I would keep walking. I wouldn’t look over my shoulder once we’re through the trees and see the defeated slump to Jessie’s shoulders.
I wouldn’t think about running back there and apologizing to her, even though she’s been the one driving me away.
But I turn, and I take a few steps in her direction.
She’s scared. Terrified, even. She’s not acting like herself, and she needs me to be there for her. It isn’t right to walk away when she needs me.
Patrick’s gloved hand lands on my shoulder before I can get far. His grip tightens and holds me in place. “We have things to do right now, Brookes.”
I sigh and run my hand down my face, the cold doing little to shock me back into focus. “I know. She’s terrified to be out here right now though. A lot happened in her past and Jessie needs someone to be there with her.”
Patrick’s hand drops. “And that person isn’t going to be you right now. I know you’re worried about her, but we’re out here looking for hikers. This isn’t a training exercise. Lives are at risk. We need to be thorough and quick as we go up the mountain.”
The sky darkens as more clouds roll in. As the wind howls through the bare trees and whips around the pines, snow falls down around us. It gathers on the branches of bushes and trees, bowing them toward the earth.
It would almost be pretty if we didn’t have to worry about people on the mountain freezing to death.
“I’m sorry. I know we have a job to do out here.” I tuck my hands deep into my pockets, knowing that I need to conserve as much warmth as I can.
Patrick adjusts his harness, tightening a strap. “I know. You love her and you’re worried about her. I can see that. But right now, you have to put that to the side. You need to think about where these hikers are, and how we’re going to get them back down the mountain.”
The cold wind bites at my bare cheeks. I pull up my neck warmer, covering my mouth and cheeks. I grab a pair of goggles from one of my pockets and slide them on, protecting them from the snow and the cold.
“I’ll focus on what we have to do.” I swallow hard, trying to ease the lump in my throat. “I won’t let you down.”
Patrick slides on his own pair of goggles and raises his scarf. “I know you won’t. You’re a good man, Brookes. You just lead with your heart a lot. It’s not a bad thing.”
I scoff and kick some snow before we start to weave our way through the trees. “You should try telling my father that.”
Patrick laughs, putting one hand against a tree to steady himself as he climbs over a fallen tree. “Difficult parents are nothing new. If your father can’t see you for the man you are, then it’s his problem.”
I stoop down to lift up the rescue sled. “I know. I’ve spent a lot of years working through that. He came to the hospital and made Jessie look like a fool though. I don’t know how to move past that with him.”
Patrick hums as I lift the sled and balance it on the tree. He grabs the other side and takes the weight of the sled, lowering it to the ground on the other side.
I climb up onto the tree and steady myself with the branches to my right. My foot starts to slip but I catch myself, my shoulder slamming into the tree.
“You alright?” Patrick waits until I hop down from the tree and have both feet on solid ground.
“Yeah. My shoulder’s probably going to hurt in the morning, but I’m fine.”
Patrick stares at me for a moment longer before giving a sharp nod and taking a few more steps through the snow. “Back to your dad being a dick—some people weren’t meant to be parents. But, are you really going to let one thing a dickhead parent said get in between the two of you?”
I put my foot out, feeling for ice hidden beneath the snow. When I find none, I take a few quick steps, walking beside Patrick as he leads the way up the mountain.
“I’m not letting it get between us, but it seems like Jessie has fixated on it. She keeps insisting that all we do is distract each other. It feels like I’m fighting a losing war.”
“It sounds like there’s more going on in your life.” Patrick looks around, searching for the hikers. “Spread out here a bit. The brush gets a little thicker the higher up we get. I want to make sure that we’re searching as much as we can before the sun goes down.”
I move away from him, crouching low and looking beneath the pine trees only to find piles of needles. “There’s a lot going on where my father is concerned. He’s supposed to give me a million dollars to start a rural ambulance service as long as I don’t screw up my residency. He thinks I’m going to be nothing but a failure.”
“Sounds like a champion father.”
“He’s something else.” I check beneath a few more trees as we continue following the path up the mountain. “There’s a lot of bad water underneath that bridge. I keep trying to work on the relationship, because my sister doesn’t want to cut him out, but one of these days, I think it might come to an end.”
“I wouldn’t give up hope. Some fathers take a bit more time to come around than others, but I’m sure eventually he’ll figure out what a great son he has.”
Does Patrick know how much I needed to hear that?
