Page 26 of Home Is Where You Are

I loved growing up in Haven Valley, a small town in the central part of Texas. My childhood consisted of horses, meeting all kinds of people, loving parents, annoying siblings, and Gentry. He might’ve been my brother’s best friend first, but he quickly became my everything.

Life was grand.

Until it wasn’t.

That was when I decided leaving was my one and only option. To save myself and my sanity, I got a late acceptance to Emory and Henry College in Virginia. Instead of going to Texas State University, which was the obvious choice and one I received an early acceptance to, I decided to take my chances and flee across the country.

My parents weren’t happy to say the least. Out of state tuition costs were extreme, but I couldn’t stay here. Being here now caused my anxiety to soar, but I couldn’t stay away any longer. Excuses no longer worked. It looked like my options were dwindling by the second since I’d gotten the email from one of the companies that I’d applied to informing me they had chosen other candidates. Only one option remained, and if I wasn’t chosen, I’d have to stay here until I could figure something else out.

The crunching of grass broke me out of my thoughts. I lifted my head off the tree and placed my hand over my eyes to block them from the setting sun to see who dared come up here.

Gentry.

Why is he always there when I’m breaking down?

All because every time I broke down he was there for me to lean on. I needed to figure out the best way to lean on myself and heal. Without him there. But apparently, he wasn’t having it.

“Any confessions today?”

We called it the confession tree for a reason.

“No.” I choked on a sob. I didn’t want him to see me breaking down. I didn’t want to explain the reason for my tears. I wanted to be alone in my pain just the way I’d been the past four years. I’d carried this pain for so long I didn’t know how to let someone else help me through it.

Instead, he sat beside me.

Why couldn’t he leave well enough alone?

“I’m not in the mood, Gentry.”

“In the mood for what exactly?”

Was he really that dense?

“To be around people.”

“Why’s that?”

“Because I can’t handle the way I feel right now with anyone around,” I confessed.

“I’m sorry you feel that way, but I’m not leavin’. You shouldn’t be alone to wallow in your thoughts. This is our grief to share,” he replied as he moved closer behind me.

Our legs touched, and I finally took a moment to take him in. He still wore the same outfit he had on earlier in the day when I’d seen him.

I should insist he leave. But I couldn’t. My mind was spent. Done with all the emotions coursing through me.

“Talk to me, butterfly.”

I knew what he referred to when he made that demand, but I couldn’t.

Instead I asked, “Why are you still here, Gentry?”

“This is my home.”

His response shocked me to the point that I turned to look at him.

“But why? You could’ve lived with your parents after I left. I’m sure they were happy we weren’t together anymore.” His parents hated that we were together. They didn’t like the fact that my family had money while his didn’t.

I didn’t miss the way he flinched.