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“Just don’t fancy it.” I shrug.

I’m sure, if life had been different, I might have been excited at the thought of going to a prom. For a second, my mind wanders to the idea of my parents still being together, of both of them being interested in me as a person. Maybe my mother would have taken me shopping for a dress, and we would have spent the day in town as we went from place to place looking for something that was perfect. Maybe my dad would insist on a million photographs and gently remind me to keep my wits about me and not do anything I might regret with my prom date. Maybe they’d both have waved me off as I headed to the car with my date, watching my beautiful dress swish around my legs as I skipped off in a beautiful pair of high heels.

I don’t allow myself to think about it too much. That’s not how my life turned out. I can barely afford the clothes I wear now, let alone a fancy dress and pair of shoes, and that’s before I even consider the price of the prom ticket. The charity shops don't boast prom dresses among the racks, and no fairy godmother is coming to make everything magical for me.

Maybe things would have been different if Felix was here or if we had been in the same school year. He'd have told me he couldn't survive prom without me. He'd have paid for my ticket and maybe even a dress. We'd have gone together and joked about how lame it was.

For the millionth time, I'm reminded about how much I miss my best friend.

“Well, if you’re not going tonight, I guess I’ll see you on results day,” Ellie announces.

“I guess. Have a great time tonight,” I tell them, then turn away, walking in the direction of the exit from the school grounds.

I pull my mobile from my bag, switching it back on given I turned it off before the exam. The screen lights up, and a second later, a text buzzes through.

Paladin: Hey, I hope the exam went well.

I smile slightly, surprised at his message. It hasn’t been long since he dropped me near school so I could sit my final exam. I stayed at his last night, but I know it’s still a weird situation between us. It feels weirder now. His placement at the school has ended, so he’s no longer my teacher and has no responsibility towards me. He could drop everything and ignore me, especially since my exams are finished and I’m officially through with school. This morning as we left his house, I wondered if it would be the last time we spoke. A day where he could pat himself on the back and congratulate himself for helping me get through my exams.

Me: Think the last-minute revision helped. I'm now heading into work. I have a shift at work in a bit.

Paladin: What time are you working until? Aren’t you going to prom?

Me: Working until eight. And no, prom is so not my thing.

I watch the screen as I walk, but there are no further messages. I shove my phone back into my pocket and head in the direction of the shop I work at. I’m lucky the owners have been able to give me more shifts now that I’m not in lessons for the majority of the day. Every hour worked is a bit of money in my account—an account that’s remaining steady given I haven’t been spending money to pay for school lunches, entry fees to clubs, and various other costs.

I’m enjoying the sunshine and trying not to let myself get too carried away at the idea that things are changing, and for the first time in ages, it feels like they’re changing for the better. Felix will be back soon. We’ll be moving in together. I’m free from the binds that held me down, and I’ll leave my mother’s house and never look back. The freedom and change, it’s right there in front of me, a vision that feels so real it’s like I can touch it. I tuck the feeling away in my heart, but I can’t stop the little smile on my face.

***

“Dee!”

I search around for the owner of the voice, even though I know who it is. It takes me a second to spot him. He’s leaning against the side of his car, smiling at me.

I smile back and walk towards him. “Somebody could say you’re stalking me, Mr Wakefield,” I joke.

“Hmm, but then would that person get their invite to a non-prom evening?” His blue eyes seem to twinkle as he teases me.

“Is it weird to make a joke about things and call you Mr Wakefield now that you’re not a teacher?” I ask.

“Not if you find it funny.”

“So, what’s a non-prom?” I ask.

“Dinner? Dessert? A celebration of the end of your exams that doesn’t require getting dry-humped and felt up by an eighteen-year-old boy who doesn’t know what he’s doing?”

I chuckle. “What the hell went on at your prom?”

I don’t wait for an answer, nor do I give him a verbal reply to his suggestions. I just walk past him, throw my bag into the back of the car, and then get into the passenger seat.

“I went to a really good school, but apparently we lacked in sex education, as three people ended up pregnant after prom night,” Joseph states as he gets into the car. He starts the engine.

“Did your school skip the important parts of sex education? Or did they only teach abstinence and hope people followed it?” I laugh.

“No, they taught us about contraception. You know what it’s like, though, when people have had a drink and when they feel like they’re on top of the world. People let their guard down and make choices they regret.” Joseph shrugs slightly and then starts driving in the direction of his house.

“I wouldn’t know. I don’t drink,” I state.