Page 62

If Jamie hadn’t been at my house, I would have run out and grabbed some right then.

“I mean, your demeanor switched up earlier after you finished talking to whoever that was that approached you earlier.” His words nearly made me lose my appetite. “I don’t want to pry, but, was that your ex?”

“Hell no,” I frowned. “No way in hell would I ever have a civilized conversation with that man without trying to kill him. That was Jakob. We went to high school together, and he’s a police officer now. He’s one half of the pair who showed up at the scene the night everything happened at Shane’s. I hate that I let it bother me, but I was annoyed that what was supposed to be a good moment was still tainted by a reminder of that man.”

As much as I didn’t want to relive it, memories of the night’s events flooded my brain, taking me back to a time that I wished I could forget.

“Nyx,” Jamie’s touch brought me out of the horrible memories of the past.

Jumping, I blinked away the tears in my eyes. I quickly swiped them away, hoping he hadn’t caught on to the quick moment of despair. But knowing him, he did.

“You good? Where’d you go just now?”

Forcing a smile, I attempted to brush the moment off. “I’m fine. What were we talking about? Also, if you really want another cookie, I’ll give it up if you dr⁠—”

“Nyx,” he interrupted forcefully, gently removing the decorative box from my hands. “Don’t do that. Tell me what’s up?”

“There’s nothing to tell. Seeing Jakob took me back to that night and although it bothered me for a moment, I’m good now. I’m over it.”

“Those tears say otherwise,” he argued gently, thumbing my cheek. “I know that we’ve talked about what happened, but the way you continue to fall into these moments makes me feel like there’s more to the story. I don’t want to press you into discussing anything that you don’t want to, but I’m here to listen. You know that, right?”

There was a whirlwind happening in my head. I didn’t want to give Shane any more power than he already had. Continuing to talk about him and our relationship seemed to be doing just that. But, Jamie was right when he said there was something I hadn’t told him.

Probably because it was the hardest part of my break-up for me to acknowledge. The thing that sliced me to the core any time I thought about it.

“Um,” I cleared my throat. “This isn’t an easy thing for me to talk about.”

“I know, Love. That’s why I made it clear that you don’t have to do anything you don’t want to do. I only want you to trust that you have someone here outside of your family and Raelynn who doesn’t mind listening or helping in any way that I can. I hate seeing your mean ass cry,” he added the last part with a mischievous grin.

Despite the playfulness, his words tugged at something in me. During the time that we’d gotten to know each other, he’d proven time and time again that he was a man of his word. I hated that I spent my days waiting for him to reveal that it was all a façade, and he wasn’t.

I continuously braced myself for the other shoe to drop when it came to the man I found myself slowly developing feelings for. Feelings that I didn’t think for a moment would be reciprocated.

After all the time I’d spent trying to avoid it, I was in the one place that I didn’t want to be. And I had no idea how we’d gotten there.

Gnawing on my lip, I made the choice to step out on a limb and trust my instincts about him. My fingernails bit into my palm as I finally opened my mouth and forced the words out.

“Well, you already know about the fight and everything that snowballed out of control because of that. But, due to her pride being wounded or whatever, Shane’s wife also decided that she wanted to press civil charges against me for adultery. At the time, I didn’t even know that was a thing. Initially, I thought it was bullshit. I hadn’t known that he was married and by then, she knew that. I guess I was the only person she could take her anger and embarrassment out on.”

“Fuck her,” Jamie fiercely interjected. “She tried to take her shit out on you because she’s a coward.”

“And so is Shane. Because, despite him knowing damn well that he’d portrayed himself to be single, he provided all the evidence she needed of the affair.”

Jamie’s face morphed into a mask of surprise. “What?”

“Yup,” I confirmed, popping my lips. “Whatever she wanted, he gave her. Eagerly. Pictures, videos, text message screenshots, everything. Anything that could be used to prove that I knowingly inserted myself into their marriage was provided by him. It was the final smack in the face for me.”

Though my words were delivered with venom, I didn’t have the urge to cry. I didn’t want revenge, and I wasn’t allowing myself to be fueled by my anger.

Sighing heavily, Jamie replied. “I’m sorry, Nyx. You didn’t deserve any of that. He’s a bitch ass nigga, and she’s weird as fuck. They’re both going to get what’s coming to them.”

“I know. I just hope it’s not at the expense of me. And then—” I paused, bracing myself to tell the secret that only one living soul besides myself knew. “About a week after the fight and me getting out of jail, I found out I was pregnant by way of having a miscarriage.”

“Nyx,” the sympathy in his voice invoked emotions I’d long buried.

“I know how rough around the edges I am. And I know how jaded I can be. But I don’t think anyone understands just how painful all of that was for me. I lost a relationship, someone I thought I loved, was betrayed in the most heart-wrenching way, and then had to sit with the guilt of possibly being the reason I lost my child.”

“Come here,” he urged, patting the seat next to him on the couch.