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“You could just ask me now so I could say no,” Claudia said.
“Are you sure that you’d said no?” Austin teased.
Claudia walked up to Austin and leaned in real close.
“There is no kind of proposal that I be taking from you. So, if you want to waste your time getting things together go right ahead. My answer is going to be the same.”
“I might surprise you Claudia,” he said looking into her brown eyes.
For a moment Claudia wanted to lean in closer and put her arms over his shoulders and around his neck. She wanted to feel that strong heartbeat beneath her hands I think that smells just Austin. Then she remembered that indulging in one’s feelings only led to pain and heartache. She took a step away from him and started walking towards the door.
“That’s it you’re just leaving?”
“The days of me being surprised by a man have long since gone Austin. I’ll tell Jillian to wait for her invite and then we can end all of this secrecy.”
“Or just might be the beginning,” Austin replied.
“Optimism is for children,” she said as she walked out of the door.
* * *
Claudia was still thinkingon the situation when she went home that night. Of course, Jillian was beyond happy to hear she was going to be the first, but it’s still bothered Claudia that Austin was hiding a proposition for her. Gillian all the sudden thought it was romantic and secretive. When she got home late that afternoon, she told Tamara what Austin had said.
“He’s crazy,” Claudia said. “I’ve already told him no and he still won’t tell me what it is. What kind of man tells you he’s going to offer you a proposition?”
“A very secure one,” Tamara suggested.
Claudia huffed.
“He can be as secure as he wants that won’t change anything, it won’t have any bearing on my decision at all.”
“Well since your service too good-looking men in a mystery I guess there’s no fun in this at all,” Tamara said.
“Fun and mystery? I don’t think that is on our top ten On to other business I received an invitation to go to artist sale in the town over next week. They are going to be selling cloth, linen, canvases and paints,” Claudia said in as tempting a voice as she could muster. Instead of Tamara being excited, Tamara looked away distressed at anyplace except Claudia.
“I received the notice as well and I tossed it into the garbage,” she confessed. “I thought about going but I looked it up and there will be a lot of people there and all of the good items will be gone by nightfall.”
“We could always get there before nightfall. I’ll be with you.”
Claudia saw the signs in defeat go across tomorrow’s face.
“Tamara in this day in age you might find that no one notices your scar as much as you do.”
Tamara gave a harsh laugh.
“Everyone notices my scar, Claudia. They all wait around and try to find out who’s going to be the first one to ask me about it.”
“This time could be different Tamara,” Claudia said.
“And when it’s not? What do I do except slink away as others look on me with pity and in some cases even disgust?”
“I know we’ve had some bad experiences, but we have to keep trying. You deserve more than to be regulated to the night. I know this scar has been with you for a while, but you need to live. Maybe we should look into a specialist about getting the scar removed or lightened?”
Claudia looked at Tamara shake her head and was filled with frustration looking at her friend that had been through so much being held captive by her past.
“I won’t give up this scar. This mark is a part of who I am now. It tells the world what I’ve been through. I know that it is a mark of courage and not shame. The problem is I know this academically, but my heart is still ashamed. If I had the scar removed, I’d feel like I’m giving some validation to what my husband did.”
“I know you say you are not giving in to your ex-husband’s thoughts. However, I see you staying in this house all day long and only coming out when it’s mandatory for you to make money. This isn’t the life we dreamed.”
