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With a serene smile, her mom said, “I’m hoping I can be a better nurse because of my experience. The neonatal unit isn’t always a sad place; sometimes miracles happen. Life is a gift that should be celebrated, not feared. There can be a lot of sadness with such tiny, fragile babies, but there’s also so much joy. If we want to live a full life, we have to embrace all of it.”
Without a word, Colleen took her mother’s hand as they continued their walk through the park. It was a warm fall day with the sun low in the sky, making everything appear golden. There wasn’t much fall foliage in California, but it was still Colleen’s favorite time of year.
She chuckled at a few kids running after each other and the beagle that chased them. She missed Finn and Alfie. But it didn’t hurt as much. She was grateful for all she had, and for this time she spent with her mom. This was where she needed to be right now.
CHAPTER 50
FINN
After taking a shower, Finn wiped the steam from the mirror and inspected his scar. The sutures had been removed and his doctor was pleased with his progress. It was strange to watch his body heal on the outside and still ache on the inside from a self-inflicted emotional wound.
He’d been in Stony Brook for a week. With each passing day, it was getting harder to convince himself that he did the right thing. It was Friday morning in California. Colleen was spending time with her mom as planned. Sean had told him that all her brothers had decided to go home this weekend to visit their mom and support Colleen when she gave her statement on Monday.
His phone buzzed with an incoming call. He picked up his phone. Ryan. This was his third call today.Shrugging on a T-shirt and a pair of lounge pants, he debated answering until it went to voicemail. He slipped the phone into his pocket. He’d listen to it later.
The Murphy family had been very supportive, especially considering he broke up with Colleen. Eileen sent him flowers and a card. Sean had stayed in touch with him but steered away from talk about Colleen. Aidan had sent him a few texts saying he was praying for a full recovery. The only one he hadn’t talked to was Ryan. He was a hothead and Finn didn’t feel up to getting berated by an angry cop.
His phone buzzed again. “Dammit,” Finn muttered when he saw Ryan’s name again. Might as well get this over with. He took a deep breath and answered, “Ryan.”
“What the fuck, Finn? I’ve been calling you all day.”
“Here I am. Talk to me.”
“Yeah. Okay. How are you feeling?”
“Fine.” Finn snickered. “Is this why you’ve been calling me?”
“No. But I’m sorry you got shot.” Ryan paused for a few moments and sucked in a breath. “Here’s the thing. My sister needs you. Why don’t you man up and stop acting like a self-centered rich boy? Get your ass to California and be here for her.”
Ryan never hesitated to get to the point. Finn understood that for all Ryan’s trash-talk, he loved his sister and would do anything for her, even if it meant begging Finn for help. “This is hard for me, too. I love Colleen, but I have to protect her from the press and publicity.”
“Protect her from the press?” Ryan snapped “Are you shitting me? What you have to do is to be by her side. You have to put her needs above your own. In fact, what you should do is to put my sister on a motherfucking pedestal and worship at her feet. She’s way too good for you.”
Finn froze. It was like Ryan dumped a bucket of cold water on him. He never believed his decision to break up with her was selfish. It was the opposite. He was the one who lost. Colleen was strong, she was a survivor. She would create a new life without him.
“You there?” Ryan asked.
“Yeah. I’m here.”
“So, what are you gonna do? Sit on your ass at your mom’s house or join my family?” He paused and then said in a different tone, “You’re one of us, Finn. You deserve to be here.”
Finn’s pulse raced. Ryan was offering an olive branch. “I’ll have to think about it,” Finn mumbled. Ryan invited him, but what if Colleen didn’t want him there? He couldn’t blame her.
“Don’t think. Get on a plane and get here.” Click.
Finn tossed the phone onto the bed and dragged his hands through his hair with deep exhale.
****
“So, when are you going back to Montana?” Finn asked, pushing his half-eaten dinner away.
“No immediate plans,” his mom said, standing to clear the table. “Not until you can manage on your own.”
“I’m a big boy. I can handle this. I’m glad you’ve found someone who makes you happy. You deserve it.”
“So do you,” she said, ruffling his hair as she left for the kitchen.
His mom did her best to try and discourage him from breaking up with Colleen. After talking to Ryan, he was having a harder time trying to convince himself that he was doing the right thing. Finn stood and picked up the salad bowl and followed her.
