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CHAPTER12
Tati
“Didyou have to kill her? You couldn’t have just shot her in the leg or something?”
I looked up from where I’d been staring out into the desert to find Maite standing in the door that led out to the clubhouse rooftop—where I’d made my way hours ago, with a drink in my hand.
It was early in the morning, painfully so, and the impending sunrise was already making the prettiest of colors in bands across the sky.
It could have been soothing, but it wasn’t.
“I’m sorry, but I did, actually,” I answered, not having it in me to sugarcoat the truth too much.
Maite was a grown woman, and this wasn’t the fucking scouts.
We had expectations, codes to live by, all of that. And whatever the hell Trin had been up to, especially with that damn rose on her shoulder, there was no way it lived up toPredatorloyalty standards.
So yeah, she had to die.
“You’re sure she’s what Keira and the others are saying she was?” she asked, fully stepping out onto the roof with me now.
I nodded. “No doubt in my mind.”
“Do you even feel bad?”
I sighed, then reached for the bottle of bourbon on the table before I realized I’d only brought one glass with me.
Then I shrugged and stretched the bottle out to her anyway.
“For killing her?” I asked, as she accepted my offering. “No, not at all. For hurting you? Very much so,” I told her. “I hope you know that. I’m not a killer.”
She raised an eyebrow at me and I scoffed. “What, you need evidence? Kev is around here still alive,” I reminded her. “Is that enough? If I was going to recklessly kill anybody, he’d be the first in line. I only did what I felt was absolutely necessary. She was already up out of her seat, prepared to do who knows what.” I shook my head. “If I could go back in time and have you steal a different man’s wife with your backpack, I promise you; I would.”
“Seriously, Tati?” she groaned, trying to sound angry about it until she had to give in with a soft chuckle. “You know, the more I think about it, the more I wonder… if anything beyond the sex was even real. Was it about using me for information? Or did that just happen to be a perk?” She unscrewed the top from the bottle and took a deep swig, then shook her head. “It hurts less that she’s gone if I tell myself I was always just a mark.”
“’Cause then you can be angry instead of hurt?”
Maite nodded. “My head is messed up either way, but I think I like being pissed a little more.”
“Understandable.” I sat back on the bench, stretching my legs out. “So who are you pissed at? Just Trin or still me too?”
“You too, bitch, duh!” she said, frowning at me. “How many times didstupidcome out of your mouth?”
“No, you gotta give me a break on that one,” I said. “Because objectively…you kind of were being…”
“I’d just been physically assaulted and witnessed a murder. My world was getting turned upside down, Tati. We can’t all be Miss Badass Unaffected.”
“Unaffected.” I cringed. “Who said that?”
“You did, basically,” she countered. “I mean look at you. Your assault happened what…three months ago? Two? And you’re already back up at ’em, running shit, guns blazing, all in love. If I didn’t know it happened…I wouldn’teven know it happened.”
“But that doesn’t mean I’m unaffected,” I argued. “It just means that I… I can’t stay in that place. Like mentally, I cannot stay mired in that. I’d never deny it happened, and when those emotions come up, I let them out. But on a day-to-day basis? I simplycannotlinger on the fact that a motherfucker I somewhat trusted betrayed me to such a severe degree that it’s almost like…really, nigga? Like I knew you were trash, that was part of the appeal, butreally?” I shook my head, taking another sip from my drink. “You out here talking aboutunaffectedlike I didn’t literally stab that nigga in the dick a week ago.”
Maite’s eyes went wide. “What?!”
I nodded. “Yeah. You’ve been so busy booed up with Trin that you weren’t even really keeping up with what was going on around here,” I reminded her. “I called you to let you know that you needed to keep your distance ’cause we were about to run through that motherfucker’s house and, instead of doing that, you told his wife. Which I’m still mad atyouabout by the way.”
“Was Inotsupposed to tell someone I loved something that could have saved their life?” she huffed.
