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How?
I didn’t understand it.
How could that beautiful woman give me a chance, knowing I was responsible for so many of her nightmares?
The bottle, which had been three-quarters of the way full when the bartender had placed it beside me, was suddenly empty. The world began to sway, and I tossed down several large bills, not caring if I gave the man everything in my pocket. Turning, I stumbled through the crowd, bumping into people left and right, getting cursed at and shoved back a few times before I made it to the door.
My driver was waiting where I’d left him, and I climbed into the back, mumbling for him to take me home. As he drove, the whisky did what it always did to me when I had too much. I went from hating myself for what I’d caused to happen to Lis—fucking Calista Ramirez, my drunken brain reminded me—to being pissed that she hadn’t told me sooner.
How the fuck could I have been with her for over six months and not realize who the hell she really was? She hadn’t changed that much since we were teens. I’d memorized her face back then, but faces didn’t always click in my brain, especially when I hadn’t seen or thought about them in a long time.
The longer the whisky flowed through my veins, the angrier I got, until all I was seeing was red. My driver stopped outside my apartment building and got out, but I waved him off, snapping, “I can open my own motherfucking door.”
“Yes, Mr. Hannigan,” he muttered.
Walking into the building, I glared at the men on guard duty. One of them pushed the call button for the elevator, and it opened instantly. Unsteady on my feet, I walked in and had to lean down and blink at the numbers on the panel a few times before I saw it clearly enough. It took three tries before my finger actually connected with my floor number.
My stomach did gross things as the elevator lifted higher and higher, but I burped and swallowed the taste of bile just as the doors slid open. The apartment was in darkness, and as I wavered on my feet, trying to find my room without bothering with turning on a light, I bumped into a table.
The sharp corner jabbed into my thigh so hard the damn thing scraped across the floor loudly. Cursing, I angrily shoved it back even farther before starting toward the direction I figured my bedroom was.
Only to hit the back of the couch.
“Motherfuck!” I snarled and flipped the damn thing just as light filled the room and burned my eyes.
Jerking around, I saw Ryan standing there—with my little sister right behind him.
“What the fuck is wrong with you?” Nova’s voice was so loud, my ears rang, but I was too pissed to care that she was obviously mad at me.
What right did she have to be upset? I was the one who had been played. And she probably knew all about it. She and Cali had been friends on Instagram, and I’d catch hell from my sister every time I commented…
I hope you get raped and left for dead.
Rage at her, at Lis—but mostly at myself—filled me, and I tried to focus on Nova. “You…” I stumbled toward her. “You knew, didn’t you?”
“Knew what?” she demanded, sounding condescending in my drunken state.
“About Lis…Cali. Whatever the fuck her name is.” I took another step toward her, only to stumble into yet another table. Cursing, I picked up the lamp that was sitting there and threw it. The sound of it shattering against the wall did nothing to alleviate any of my anger. “You knew who she really was, didn’t you?”
“Garret…” Nova’s beautiful face morphed right before my eyes from sneering to sweetly soothing. “Are you really going to tell me you didn’t know who she is? How many hours did you spend looking at all those pictures? Don’t lie to me and say you had no clue that Lis was Calista.”
“I didn’t!” I shouted the denial. “She lied to me. For months. I bet you and she had a real good laugh, playing me along.”
My heart lurched at the thought, and I couldn’t stop the sound that left me as a new realization hit me. The agony was too much, and I slammed my fist down on the table that was still in my damn way. “No wonder that bastard Ramirez is in the city. He’s here to take her away from me.”
I couldn’t let that happen. He’d already hurt her enough. If Manuel got his hands on her again, he was liable to kill her.
“No one was laughing at you, dumbass,” Nova snarled at me. “And if you had no clue who she really was, then that is completely on you. Do you even remember how you were back then, Garret? The way you would bully her?” The disgust on her face made my stomach roil. “You were a monster at times.”
“No,” I tried to deny.
I hope you get raped and left for dead.
Tears filled my eyes. “I wasn’t like that—”
“You were.”
I started to argue, but the next thing I knew, Nova’s hand was smacking across my face so hard, my head snapped back. “You told her she deserved to be raped!”
