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Sophia froze. She drew back sharply.
“What did you just say?”
“I’ve realised that my feelings for you are not something I can ignore. They’re strong, and they’re not going to go away. Getting married to Aimee when you’re around is going to kill me. I can’t do it.”
Sophia felt like her chest was tightening. What was happening? Did he just say what she thought he said?
“You … you can’t say this. You mustn’t say this.”
“Why mustn’t I? What’s wrong with that? I just want to do what’s right for both of us. For everyone.”
“How is it right for Aimee? She’s the one you are to marry, not me! I can’t take her fiancé away from her, even if I have feelings for you.”
Thomas frowned.
“Even if I can’t see myself marrying her? That if I had a choice, I would rather marry you?”
Now Sophia was really beginning to panic. It felt like everything was crashing down around her and her quiet life. This was not quiet at all. It was as if a storm was happening over her, and she was stuck in the middle.
Part of her wanted to throw herself into Thomas’ arms and say she would marry him. Her heart was starting to go that way. But her head, the rational part of her, was telling her that this would not happen. Not if it left Aimee heartbroken.
She couldn’t do it to her.
“I … you need to go back to your family, Thomas.”
“What?” Thomas blinked. “What about us?”
“Please, just … this is … it’s all too much.” Sophia shook as she picked up her sketchpad, not bothering to look for her pencil. “Forgive me, I … I can’t.”
She could hear Thomas shouting after her as she hurried off, but Sophia didn’t stop. Even though she wanted to go back and bury herself in his embrace again. It had felt so comfortable and natural to be in his arms. Sophia wanted that back again.
But she couldn’t. An image of Aimee was firmly in her mind, and what this meant for her and their family. She knew how this would tear the family apart because of her actions.
Even if her heart was saying that was what she wanted, her head said this couldn’t happen. She had to remember her place.
No matter how much it hurt to go back to it.
Chapter 15
Thomas went back to Pierce’s house in a daze. He hadn’t thought his conversation with Sophia would go the way it did. When she melted into his arms as he kissed her, he thought she would agree to be his wife. But instead, she had pulled away, reminding him of Aimee. Even though she and Aimee did not get along at all, she was still thinking about her sister.
Her compassion was admirable.
Maybe he shouldn’t have told her he wanted to marry her instead. That probably scared her. Thomas had seen how she interacted with people and how shy she was around him. It didn’t take a smart man to know that she was inexperienced with gentlemen, which made her innocence rather sweet. He should have been a bit less insistent and not thrown himself onto her as he did.
But one look at her with those beautiful eyes, and Thomas was unable to help himself.
After what had happened with Constance and how crushing she had been when she turned him down, he didn’t think he could fall in love again. That he wouldn’t find that one person who could complete him. It was mostly why he had agreed to let his parents arrange this match. Now he had met Sophia and had spent time with her, and Thomas knew he could love again.
Therein lay the problem. How could he marry Aimee with that love for Sophia? It would crush him, and it wouldn’t be fair on anyone. Even Aimee didn’t deserve to be treated like this. He had to respect her as well.
He had created a mess. And Thomas knew he had to be the one to get it right.
There was still time. Even though there was talk about marriage, talking as if they were already engaged, and the banns were pretty much ready to go, Thomas hadn’t proposed to Aimee yet. That was what everyone was waiting for. Then the ball would roll, and things would smoothly transition into a wedding.
Thomas hadn’t wanted to rush with this, but now he certainly didn’t want to do it.
He had to tell his father.
