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She brings my head down to hers and kisses me. Our lips mould like they’re made for each other. “How about we leave this here and go back to bed? Because right now, there’s only one thing I want from you,”
My brows pinch in a frown. I don’t want to ruin this moment we’re having. I’ve already told her she can have everything I own. “Name it. You can have anything; I’ve told you that.”
“Don’t laugh, but I want a cuddle. I want to lie in your arms and know that someone actually loves me.” That almost has me falling to the floor. Emily Lancaster is loved but she makes it hard on everyone else to be accepted.
Bending down, my hands cup beneath her bum and I lift her up into my arms, she wraps her legs around my hips, locking her ankles. “You can have as many cuddles as you want sweetheart,” I kiss her again before releasing her lips, “because I’d like nothing more than holding you in my arms all night.” I declare holding her tightly and take her upstairs. We climb into bed snuggling up close, not even leaving a breath of air between us as she lays her cheek against my chest. With her arm slung across my body and me holding her tight, we soon drift to sleep.
CHAPTERNINETEEN
EMILY
“How could something so good, be so bad?”That’s what he said to me. Those words are ingrained into my brain and have been swimming around my head all night, and again are the first things I think of this morning. When I wake up Troy’s wrapped around me like a vine, and although he’s making me hot I daren’t move. I’m enjoying having him this close to me. A little vulnerable, like he needs me and doesn’t want to let me go - or is that me? I just want a few minutes before we both wake properly and have to go back to the real world. The world where we need to work at this if we really want to be together. If we want a new beginning, then we need to rewrite the old one.
Can I trust him?
I guess that’s something I’ll just have to work out on my own.
Gently lifting his hand from me, I move to the edge of the bed, placing his hand back where I was lying. I sit there for a moment just looking at him. He looks so relaxed and peaceful as he sleeps. I swear some of his stress comes from me and wanting to appease me. My heart stutters as his breathing hitches softly, it makes me wonder what he’s dreaming about. With a small smile at the gorgeous man in the bed, it’s then that I realise he told me he loved me, and I never said it back. I don’t think I’m ready to put my heart back on the line and say those three words. They’re thrown around all too easily.
Easing myself up from the mattress so I don’t wake him, I pad across the soft, thick pile carpet and go into the ensuite, closing the door behind me. The cold tiles are heaven on my bare feet as I go over to the mirror on the wall and stand in front of it. Black mascara is smudged beneath them from where I didn’t take it off when I got home, and the whites of my eyes are a little bloodshot from lack of sleep. I cross the floor to the walk-in shower, turn the nozzle for the water letting it heat up first before going back to the mirror. Taking a cleansing wipe from the packet I swipe it over my eyes to remove the black smudges and leave it on the sink, then strip out of the t-shirt that’s currently swamping me and throw it on the floor. Stepping beneath the spray, the tension begins to leave my body as soon as the hot water hits me, tilting my head back as the water pours down my hair. It feels so good. The bathroom door opens but I act like I haven’t heard it and carry on with my shower, squirting some shampoo into my palm and reach up to massage it into my roots. Troy hasn’t said a word, but I can feel his eyes on me. It makes me feel sexy when he watches me. As he steps inside his body touches mine, it’s like he’s hit a switch. My body flares with need, electricity flowing through me as he cups my shoulders while his hardness nudges my back. With my hair washed, I drop my arms and move back under the spray again.
“I wondered where you’d gone?” His hands brush my arms as he bends his head and kisses my cheek. I move forward an inch and tip my head back again to rinse the shampoo from my hair. “Close your eyes.” he mutters quietly. They close on his command while his hands stroke down my hair, adding some pressure to my scalp to remove the shampoo and squeezes my mass of hair before repeating his actions. His hands feel amazing, they’re soothing and just what I need. “I think it’s all out now.”
“Thank you.” I say squeezing the water from my hair just to my make sure all the shampoo is gone as he turns me to face him.
“Good morning, beautiful.” He greets, and a smile tips my lips up. His usually tidy hair is a little unkempt and his eyes shine, but I’m not sure what with. I haven’t had coffee yet so I’m not functioning at top speed. I was hoping a shower first would help. I reach up and tidy his hair a little before bringing his head to mine and kiss him softly.
“Good morning,” I reply, pulling back a little and reaching up to run my hand over his face. “You look tired.”
“I’m wide awake now.” A smirk pulls the corner of his mouth up. “Are you okay?” I nod, not wanting to voice my train of thought from earlier. I’d rather just be here in the moment instead of the confusion that gathers in my mind. It’s a scary place sometimes.
His hands cup my face as he leans down and teases my lips with his tongue to get me to open them for him. How can I resist when he asks so nicely? My hands grip his sides as I push up to kiss him properly, his tongue sliding seductively along mine. My thighs clench as that spark begins in my core. I tug him closer, our wet bodies sliding against the other. “Hmm.” He releases my lips. “Now that is some wake up call.” His hard cock nudges my belly, and I can’t deny how much I want him right now. My hand travels down until I’m grasping his hardness and wrapping my fingers around his shaft. “Jesus, Em.” He gasps loudly. Considering its always Troy that initiates sex I thought I’d be the one to take what I want this time. After cuddling last night, and giving me what I needed, I thought that maybe I’d pay back the favour. “What do you need, Em?”
“You’re going to make me say it?” I ask before nibbling on my lip as he slowly nods his answer.
“I want to hear the words fall from those lips. Just tell me what you want.” His nose brushes up the side of my face as he whispers. His voice captivates me as my breath catching in my throat as his fingers brush my body before sliding one finger slowly inside me.
“Oh fuck.” My legs part further to give him more access.
“That isn’t telling me, baby. You need to say the words and it’s all yours.” Sliding my hand up and down rhythmically he moves me back to the tiled wall, my back hitting it while his other hand comes to lean against it. Adding another finger inside me, they work quicker, rougher and I cry out as I hook a leg around the back of his.
I raise my eyes to his and stare into them. “I want you, Troy.” My gasps make my voice lower, huskier. “I want you inside me.”
He smiles wide. “Your wish is my command.” He doesn't waste a second. His fingers slip from me then lifts me, keeping my back against the wall and with his cock nudging at my entrance, he thrusts upwards, filling me deliciously. My hands go around his head and his lips find my neck, sucking and nibbling as he drives in and out of me, pushing me up the wall as he thrusts. Jesus this man knows how to satisfy. What’s more, he knows what I want. My fingers grasp his wet skin as I try to hold on to him. My orgasm climbs as I lock my ankles at his back, trying to gather some friction. “Troy.'' He pushes inside me harder, almost hitting my cervix. With my hand firmly on his cheek I turn his face to mine and kiss him, our tongues tangling as I swallow his loud moans. As the fireworks begin to explode in my abdomen, he releases my lips again and I push against him harder. His hands move to my hips while he slams in and out of me.
“Fuck, Emily. You’re fucking amazing.”
“Oh shit, Troy.” I look him in the eye. “Make me come.”
A salacious smile widens his lips, his green pools darken like the sea as though I’m swimming out into the unknown, and with one more hard thrust he’s hitting all the right places. Crying out loudly, my face buries in his neck, he soon follows me, shouting my name over and over as he slows his rhythm, bringing us both down from the high we’ve just been riding. Our heavy breaths fill the confined space before he kisses me again, passionately, lovingly, totally consuming me. I cling onto him like my life depends on it and push my face into his neck. The Wham song pops into my head; The Edge of Heaven because that’s how I feel right now - like I’m teetering on the edge, and I could fall either way.
Taking my legs from around him, he helps me put my feet on the floor then lifts my chin to look at my face. “Hey, what’s wrong?” As I come back to the here and now, I don’t realise tears have filled my eyes until he’s wiping them away. “Em? Tell me. Please.”
“It’s nothing.” Pushing forward I drop my forehead to his chest, his chin rests on top of my head and I feel the sigh leave his lungs. “I’m being silly.” I try to play it down because in all honesty, I don’t know why I’m crying, especially after one of the best moments I’ve ever experienced but I am anyway. Fuck me and my doubts.
CHAPTERTWENTY
TROY
