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He scoffed and then turned away like he couldn't even stand to look at me. I didn't know why that made me mad, but I was with Tommy first. He knew about him, and it wasn't like it was some betrayal on my part.
“When I find out, I will let you know.”
I didn’t think that made him happy. Frank was looking at me like I was the worst person in the world, so it wasn't like we had to talk about it now. We still had several months till our child was born. Right now, I didn’t have an answer one way or another. There was no sense torturing ourselves about it, when an answer was so long in the future. I knew that it was a messed-up situation that I put myself in. I was well aware of that, and I did not need someone to remind me of it.
“You really think that I'm going to walk away? Are you fucking kidding me? You just told me that you're probably carrying my baby and I'm supposed to wait for your call? You really don't know me that well.”
“No, I don't, but I do know that I deserve somebody that will actually fight for me.”
“It was a lot to be sprung on me. I'm sorry that I hesitated.”
I wished it was true, but I knew it wasn't. He had already said that he suspected I was working with Tommy. Since he was now in my place and it was definitely not the finest, I guessed he had decided that I was telling the truth. I resented the fact that he thought that at all, and that I needed to prove myself to him.
“How did you find me, Frank?”
“Like I said, I went to see Tommy.”
“When you said it I just thought you were joking.”
“Well, the joke’s on me. Here I am, thinking that I'm going to be the one surprising you, but as always, Amber, it's never what I think it's going to be and I’m the one that ended up with a surprise, didn't I?”
I clicked my tongue. What did he even want me to say? Frank stared at me for several moments and then asked me the one thing that I didn't want to answer.
“Were you really going to tell me?”
I nodded and agreed. “You and Tommy look a lot different. I was going to tell one of you when I knew for certain. That’s when I would have said something, not before. There is no point in you knowing about it now.”
“Did you really think that I wouldn't want to be there?”
I started to repeat myself again but stopped. There was no point in saying that again. Maybe what I had been thinking all this time was wrong, but where did that leave us? It's not like we could just forget about it and go on like nothing happened. We were still from two very different worlds, and I didn't know how it would ever work out. I was the type who knew people like Tommy, and Frank was a doctor. I'm sure that he wouldn't want to be tied to me. I had quite a past after all.
“I still don't know why this changes anything, Frank. When I find out, I'll let you know.”
“No.”
I scoffed. “No?”
“I’m not going anywhere.”
“Well, I’m pretty sure you have to now. At least tell me how she's doing before you go. Has she made peace with other nannies yet?”
He smiled, though it didn’t look like a happy one. “Of course, you would ask about her. You don't know how much she asks about you, Amber. I can't wait to tell her that she has a brother or sister coming. She always wanted one, but my ex-wife wasn’t ready for another one.”
It was going too fast, and I told him so. “We don't even know...”
“I know, it’s mine.”
“No, Frank, I'm pretty sure that's not how it works. You can’t just will something the way you want it.”
“Works that way for me. That’s how you came into my life, sheer will. I’d been waiting for you for a long time and all of a sudden, here you are.”
I just kind of looked at him like he was crazy and before I could say anything else, he was trying to kiss me again.
“I’m serious, Frank. It’s time for you to go.”
“I'm not going anywhere.”
“Yes, you are. This is my house. I get a choice of who is here.”
