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Donovan raises his eyebrows in surprise. “Jackson? If you tell me she has feelings for him or he somehow got her in bed, I will murder him.”
He squints his eyes and tightens his jaw at the idea. The thought of Jackson convincing her to sleep with him has my blood pressure rising by the second as well.
I shake my head. “No, I don’t think so. The feelings part, that is, and I’m sure they haven’t slept together. It’s the way she’s so friendly with him, and he eats it up. When have you known him to be like that with a woman and not have ulterior motives? I never have in the five-plus years I’ve worked for you.”
“That’s certainly been Jackson’s MO in the past. I don’t know. Honestly, I would be shocked to find out he put the moves on her. He knows what she’s been through, and I think it somehow bonded them. Sad as that connection is. They’ve had each other to lean on for support these last few months. Kasey’s never said anything to me about them becoming too close, and I know she would have. Hell, she would’ve had no problem stepping in and telling him to fuck off if she thought he was after anything other than friendship.” He chuckles.
“I’m afraid I made a mess of things this morning. My mouth run away with itself, and I accused her of having feelings for him and me just being a warm body. It went over with her as you would expect.” I feel just as stupid about my outburst now as I did this morning.
I shake my head at the memory. God, I wish I could rewind to earlier when she came into the kitchen. Maybe even to last night. I’m not sure which part I would have changed, though—the kiss or having stopped it before we got carried away.
“I remember not too long ago, when I thought I fucked things up royally with Kasey. I said things out of anger I didn’t mean either. Different situation, but similar results. She wouldn’t speak to me for weeks. You have to get right in your head before you can take it anywhere with Lindsey. That might mean having a conversation with Jackson to put your worries where he’s concerned at rest. It also means you need to decide if exploring these feelings that you have for Lindsey is going to blow up in your face. And if you’re willing to deal with the fallout.” He gives me a pointed look.
It’s obvious Donovan is worried it will blow up in all our faces in spectacular fashion. Honestly, it could. My mum used to tell me I have a savior complex. Maybe she’s right and I see Lindsey as a wounded bird that needs rescuing. No, that isn’t right. When I think of Lindsey, I think of a survivor who went through hell for a week being held captive by a madwoman. She had no idea when or if she would be rescued. Of course, she’s still working through the trauma of the events, but my girl is a fighter.My girl. When I found her and she clung to me and couldn’t stop shaking, I knew I would do whatever it took to see her better. I don’t know why, but I knew that I had to make sure she felt safe again.
“Yeah, I think I need to give Jackson a call.” I nod my head, mind made up.
Donovan sees the resolve in my eyes and a ghost of a smile flits across his lips.
“It’s after three, so he should be rousing from sleep about now.” Donovan rolls his eyes. We’re all aware of Jackson’s late-night activities. Even though I haven’t been asked to keep my eyes on him lately, it doesn’t mean he’s a reformed man. He’s still a twat in my book.
“Yes, I’m sure he’ll be thrilled to hear from me as well.” I really don’t want to deal with him, but I have to put my mind at ease before I can take any step with Lindsey. If I take a step with Lindsey.Who are you kidding here, Clarke? That decision is as good as made.
“Thanks, Donovan. I’ll leave you to it.”
“All right, Aiden. If you see my brother, try to keep bloodshed to a minimum. We’re supposed to have dinner with my parents sometime next week. My mother would hate to see her baby boy bruised up.”
“What about your dad?” I give him a wry grin. Gerald Hayes loves his other son, but wouldn’t mind seeing him a little worse for the wear every now and again, I’m sure.
Donovan laughs. “We both know the answer to that.”
I chuckle walking out the door and take out my phone to call Jackson.
Here goes.
Chapter seven
Lindsey
Whattheactualfuckwas that about? I can’t believe he had the audacity to say that shit to me. He actually thinks I have feelings other than friendship for Jackson? I mean, yeah, he’s a good-looking guy, but that’s gross. I look at him like a brother. And I’m not an idiot. I’ve been a reporter for my entire adult life. I was doing a damn story about Jackson involving sex clubs and payoffs before I knew him and before his stalker held me hostage. Trust me, I know all about the playboy everyone sees.
What they don’t see, though, is the guy who looked completely distraught when we were in the hospital after my sister threw major blame on him for the situation. Or the guy who would sit next to me while I was having one of my days when I was stuck in fear and couldn’t talk to anyone. He didn’t try to get me to open up and talk, he just stayed by my side. They also don’t see the guy who was so adamant for me to start therapy to help me cope that he practically got on his knees and begged me. I don’t know where or when it happened, but he’s one of my best friends, and I could never look at him any other way.
I can’t deal with jealousy, though. That’s a hard no in relationships for me. What does Aiden think is going to happen? I’m going to suddenly realize my undiscovered feelings for Jackson and bed hop?
Yeah, that’s not the kind of girl I am by a long shot, asshole.
Maybe he thinks once I get better and can actually leave my apartment (fingers crossed), I’ll find someone better in the ‘outside world’? That thought has irritation coursing through me. Again, not me.
It’s not like we have this deep, burning love thing happening. It was only one kiss after all, but I would be lying if the thought of us being more than roommates or friends didn’t cross my mind a time or two hundred. He’s a good-looking guy who seems a little damaged by life. Right up my alley, unfortunately.
I’m also not the type who likes to get involved with emotionally unavailable men, and after his display this morning, Aiden doesn’t strike me as someone open to emotional attachments. In fact, he gives a very strong impression that he’ll run the other way if things start to get deep. I’ve been accused of being the unavailable one a time or two. I always felt terrible for it, but when you grow up seeing the love your parents have for each other and the damage losing that can cause, you tend to be slightly closed off yourself.
There’s something about Aiden, though. Something that draws me to him. Something that wants to make him smile and laugh, even if it’s at my quirkiness. He has a protective side I like to see. He knew what he was doing when he helped me with the glass last night. He saw the panic in my eyes and put two and two together when he saw the broken bottle. He made me feel safe. That’s not something that happens often.
I need to talk this out. I call Abigail and she picks up right away.
“Hey, little sister from another mister. What can I do for you this fine morning?” Her voice is bright and all too chipper for my mood.
