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The moment she pulled the book out, a folded piece of paper fell to the floor. It appeared as though it was between her book and the other books. Curious, Edwina picked it up and unfolded it. As her eyes moved across the sheet, she felt unwanted. That sense of loneliness that had followed her all her life shrouded her then. What she was reading was a letter Albert had written to Roxanne.
There was great tenderness in those words and it was as though the man that had written that letter was not the Albert she knew. She was, once more, reminded of the reason she had decided to raise a wall between her and him. It was necessary.
Still, her chest tightened. As though hundreds of needles were piercing her.
Chapter Twenty-Two
"Are you certain this is not just about your wounded pride again?" Steven asked Albert as he helped himself to some brandy from the liquor service.
He had given Mercer his consent to marry at the Hersings Chapel, and he had sent his solicitor to procure him a special license from the Archbishop of Canterbury’s office four days ago. He was due to return any day now, but Albert was not too bothered by it.
Steven had just found out about Mercer's request and his obliging him. He would not stop asking him questions and Albert was growing rather weary of it. He did not blame him for the questions, really. The entire picture of his former lover marrying another on his Estate with his blessing was ironic, indeed. In Steven’s place,hewould ask a thousand questions, including some to confirm his sanity.
"How many times must I tell you to leave Roxanne in the past, where she belongs, Steven?" Albert answered, folding the missive he had just finished writing and sealing it. "She was a mistake, and I have put it behind me,” he added.
"Well, I just wanted to make certain you are not up to something again. We might have disagreed a lot in the past week but I am still going to watch you and make sure you make the right decisions." Steven took a sip of his drink and sat in one of the chairs before the hearth, stretching his legs before him and crossing them at the ankles.
"What am I, four-and-twenty and still green behind the ears? Come now, Steven, have a bit more faith in me, would you?"
"An absurd request, considering your past with Roxanne. What would they ask for next? For you to be Mercer’s best man?" Steven asked, frowning. Before he could respond, he asked another question, "Do you think the boy knows about your past with his fiancée?"
"I doubt he does," Albert replied. "Mercer may be young, but he is proud. I should think he would wish to keep his woman as far away from me as possible if he knew."
"I suppose," Steven agreed. "And Edwina? Does she know about her brother's request?"
Over the last five days, she had avoided him as best as she could, spending most of her time either with Miss Matthews or by herself. Albert had kept himself aware of her activities. He believed it was best to study her first before approaching her about the contents of those letters that had so upset her.
The only time Albert saw her was at dinner, and even then she had assiduously tried to avoid being alone with him. On the rare occasion that they got some semblance of privacy to talk, she completely dismissed his questions about marriage.
Something was very wrong, and it worried him that she was keeping it from him. "I told her when I asked her to marry me,” Albert told him, taking a blank parchment from a sheaf and dipping his quill in ink.
"You asked her towhat?" Steven choked on his drink and began to cough profusely.
Albert looked up, then removed a handkerchief from his coat pocket and tossed it at him. “Do you need water?” he asked.
“No, thank you,” Steven returned when he had calmed down. “Do you truly mean what you just said about asking Edwina to marry you?”
"Yes, Steven,” he said slowly. “I asked her to marry me but she turned my offer down. She wishes to maintain our initial arrangement.” Telling Steven that took some effort, and although he had tried to not think of her rejection, it greatly pained him.
"My God!" Steven exclaimed, regarding him as though he were a foreign object he was seeing for the first time. "You are in love, Al!"
Albert's jaw clenched, and he said, "Why are you so quick to make senseless assumptions? She obviously has no prospects, and since we are this far in, I thought it would be wise to take my promise a step further. I will eventually have to take a wife. Why not now?"
"That is a lot of ways to hedge around admitting that you have fallen, and I believe you have hit the ground rather hard." Steven chuckled. “What are you going to do about the rejection?”
“I must simply convince her.”
“Well, I wish you luck with that. Edwina is not an easy woman to convince. I do not know her as much as you do but I know that much.” Albert did not bother with a response as his thoughts churned with possibilities. He had come to care about Edwina, that fact was well known to him. What surprised him the most was how the mere thought of her kindled a fire in him that he never knew was possible until now.
But enveloping this all was something else. Something he was reluctant to give a name to for fear of it becoming real. That thing, whatever it was, stood between him and Edwina, and until he could understand it, completely attaining her was uncertain.
A knock interrupted his thoughts. When he answered, Chessman walked in and bowed. “The horse has arrived, Your Grace,” he informed him.
Albert smiled. He had been waiting a while for the horse to arrive from Spain, and this presented him with the perfect excuse to get away from his cousin and his incessant interrogation.
He made his way to the stables, where the head groom, Rufus, was tending to the new arrival, a magnificent gray Andalusian mare with much enthusiasm. “How is she?” he asked.
"A finer horse I never saw, Your Grace." Rufus straightened on his entrance and bowed. "Feels a great honor to have her here." Rufus’ outward excitement was only rivaled by his own inward excitement.
